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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/27300400">Small Town, Big Sea</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/smilening/pseuds/smilening'>smilening</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>TOMORROW X TOGETHER | TXT (Korea Band)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, But also, Children's Book Author Huening Kai, Comfort/Angst, Confident Gay Huening Kai, Domestic Fluff, M/M, Mild Sexual Content, Shy Huening Kai, Small Towns, Strangers to Lovers, Teacher Choi Soobin</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>In-Progress</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-10-31</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-11-28</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-18 10:27:08</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Mature</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>2</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>24,300</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/27300400</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/smilening/pseuds/smilening</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              
<p></p><blockquote>
  <p>"Indeed. I imagine we'll meet soon enough." Soobin smirked, and took Kai's hand in his own. He bent to press a kiss to his knuckles. Straightened and stepped out onto the carport. "Goodnight."</p>
  <p>"Uh—" Kai blinked. "Goodnight!"</p>
  <p>He watched Soobin walk away, and tried to ignore the blush creeping up the back of his neck. He shut the door when Soobin disappeared into the shadows between two streetlamps. Leaned against it and stood for a moment in his dark hallway. He looked down at his shoes.</p>
  <p>"Wait." He made a scrunched up face. "Did he—Who <em>does</em> that?!"</p>
</blockquote>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Choi Soobin &amp; Huening Kai, Choi Soobin/Huening Kai</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>11</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>76</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. Chapter 1</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Soobin leaned his bicycle against the big maple tree just behind the schoolhouse. He straightened his collar and dusted off his jeans, and headed inside. A half hour to spare until the assembly—a half hour he would spend in one of the two classrooms, herding small children and ensuring they got at least a little work done. He hoisted his messenger bag on his shoulder. Sunlight poured in through the classroom's windows, so he kept the light off as he made his way toward his desk.</p>
<p>He let his messenger bag thud to the floor beside the desk as he sat down. It made a satisfying thunk. His class of third graders was set to arrive rather soon. He would have just enough time to situate them before the guest speaker showed up. Assuming the guest speaker, a children's book author named Huening Kai, showed up on time.</p>
<p>Unique name, by the way. He wondered if the person would be as unique as his name was.</p>
<p>A glance at the clock confirmed that he had about thirty minutes before the students would begin to trickle in. Forty until the guest would arrive. He organized his things on the desk, leaned back in his chair, and glanced out the window at the maple tree. Its leaves rustled in the slight breeze. Sunlight filtered between the branches.</p>
<p>Soobin found himself dozing a little, warm and content in his chair, with soft light streaming in from outside.</p>
<p>The rumble of the school bus alerted him to the arrival of his students. Then laughter, and chatter. Occasional screeching. He stood up, and began to write on the chalkboard.</p>
<p>Kids popped into the class one by one, until all of the third graders sat in their desks, talking amongst each other all the while. Soobin gave them a cursory glance to ensure no one was missing, as he scratched out Huening Kai's name on the board in light blue chalk. He underlined the name three times and wrote, "author," underneath it.</p>
<p>He returned the chalk to its little ledge, dusting his hands off on his jeans—a bad habit he really needed to work on. He went to the windows and pushed them open a little bit to let in the early summer breeze. Then, he turned around to face the class—if somewhat diagonally—and said, "Good morning, children." He smiled, just barely.</p>
<p>"Good morning, Teacher Soobin!" Many bright grins greeted him, and his smiled widened. He loved the children, and their imagination and sweetness. Even on his first day teaching, as a new member of the town, they'd greeted him with enthusiasm and welcoming. Despite his intimidating appearance they loved him. He just wasn't a very sunny person—didn't feel the need to display whether he was in a good mood or not. But they didn't mind, when he didn't smile. They smiled enough for themselves and him as well. And if he was stern, they always seemed unfazed and understanding. If he scolded them (gently) they listened, and if he rewarded them (often) they lit up the room with their smiles.</p>
<p>The children were probably the only ones who treated him so affectionately.</p>
<p>He moved back toward his desk, and sat down. "Today," he said. "We're going to have that guest speaker I told you about. The author." He paused, and scanned the class. Each child watched him curiously. Even Sunghoon, who usually liked to stare out the window. Soobin tapped one finger on his desk before continuing. "Do you remember what books he wrote?"</p>
<p>A few children looked at each other. In the front, a little boy raised his hand.</p>
<p>"Yes, Sunoo?"</p>
<p>He swung his legs, and said, thoughtfully, "Um, was it <em>Green Grapes and Baby Bug?</em>"</p>
<p>Soobin nodded, and leaned back in his chair. "Yes, that's one. Anyone know the others?" He spared a glance for the clock—still about five minutes left before Huening Kai was set to show up.</p>
<p>Several of his students shifted, muttering between each other, to see if they could remember. One shouted out, "<em>Ladybug Knight</em>!" with a wide beaming grin.</p>
<p>"Right! And...? What's the chapter book?"</p>
<p>Faces of concentration swept the room—pursed mouths and crinkled little brows, with exaggerated squints and scratches of the head and rubs of the chin. One boy with straight, dark hair—Niki—tilted his head to the side. A girl named Aeri in the far back corner pouted while she thought.</p>
<p>To be fair, Soobin had told them about it almost a week ago. A week is a very long time for a third grader.</p>
<p>Yue, the shortest in the class, with a braid down to her knees, threw both of her hands in the air with wide eyes. "<em>Steam Cat!</em>"</p>
<p>She looked like she might leap out of her seat at any moment. Soobin nodded, and she clapped her hands together. At that moment, the sound of a motor filled the air before cutting out sharply. Soobin frowned and stood, heading toward the classroom's door. He leaned out into the hall and waited. Across from him, Jisu peered out her class' door, as well. They exchanged curious glances.</p>
<p>Jisu mouthed, "Is that him?"</p>
<p>Soobin shook his head and said, "I don't know."</p>
<p>She seemed to disapprove.</p>
<p>After a few seconds more, the door opened, and a beautiful, tall man, though not taller not him but <em>almost</em>, fumbled with the door a moment before finally getting through. He scurried over, resettling the messenger bag hanging from his shoulder.</p>
<p>He stopped in front of Soobin.</p>
<p>"I'm Huening Kai—I hope I'm not late!" He tugged on the sleeve of his crisp white dress shirt—he seemed skittish, and fidgety. "I got a little lost on the way over!"</p>
<p>"Hello, Huening-ssi." Soobin held his hand out for Kai to shake. "You're actually right on time." Kai's handshake was not particularly firm, but it was friendly.</p>
<p>Kai let out a relieved breath, bouncing a little on his feet as he released Soobin's hand. "Thank goodness!" He straightened his shirt. "What am I reading, by the way? Mr...?" He bit his lip, just a bit, and tilted his head curiously. It was endearing.</p>
<p>Soobin, expression perhaps a little stiff, but mild, held the door to his classroom open and said, "Call me Soobin. All the children do. And we're probably going to vote on which book to read."</p>
<p>Almost immediately after Kai entered the classroom, the children directed their chatter at him. Question upon question, a mile a minute. He held up his hands in surrender and tried his best to answer them in order—</p>
<p>"Do you have pet bugs?!"</p>
<p>"Well, no..."</p>
<p>"I heard a motorcycle, did you come here on a motorcycle? My mom has a motorcycle!"</p>
<p>"Oh, really? That's interesting. I did come here on a motorcycle."</p>
<p>"Are your eyes real? They’re so pretty like my doll’s!"</p>
<p>"What—yes!"</p>
<p>"Why are you so twitchy? My brother is twitchy 'cause he loves to eat lotta candies."</p>
<p>"I'm not—"</p>
<p>"You look like a librarian!"</p>
<p>"Quiet, everyone!" Soobin took Kai's arm and swept him toward the front of the class. He steered Kai into a smallish chair behind the table in front of the chalkboard and shot his students a stern, but amused, half-glare. "Remember what I said about being polite and welcoming to Huening-ssi? Raise your hands if you have any <em>urgent</em> questions." He raised his eyebrows. "We <em>do</em> want him to read to us, after all."</p>
<p>Kai cleared his throat, where he sat. "Speaking of which!" He set his palms on the tabletop and glanced around. "What do you all want me to read?" He eyed them all.</p>
<p>"I want the one about the knight!" A girl in the front row squirmed in her seat.</p>
<p>Kai nodded, solemnly, and leaned forward, reaching one hand up to tap his chin. "That's a good one. Any other requests?"</p>
<p>The children murmured indecisively.</p>
<p>Soobin stepped forward and planted his hands on his hips. "I have an idea. We can vote on which book to read."</p>
<p>More murmurs, and nodding heads.</p>
<p>Kai grinned, while Soobin took a vote—<em>Ladybug Knight</em> won by a landslide. (If you could call a vote of seven versus five a landslide.) He set his messenger bag on the floor beside his feet, and watched Soobin retrieve a battered copy of the book from its shelf. He rummaged around until he found his reading glasses, and shoved them onto his face.</p>
<p>One student whispered, "Now he looks extra like a librarian."</p>
<p>Kai wrinkled his nose, but he laughed. His laugh was loud and unapologetic. It’s interesting. "I'm not a librarian, I swear." He leaned back in his chair. "I'm just a writer and a painter."</p>
<p>"That's right, you paint your own illustrations, don't you?" Soobin set the book on the table in front of Kai. "Very admirable."</p>
<p>Face reddening somewhat, Kai shook his head with a comical frown. "I wouldn't say it's <em>admirable</em>." He fiddled with his collar. "Just artistic?"</p>
<p>Soobin smiled a little bit as he headed to his desk. He sat, and said, "Still, quite impressive."</p>
<p>"I—uh—" Kai cleared his throat again, blushing prettily. "Anyway! Should we start?"</p>
<p>The response was many enthusiastic nods and a chorus of "Yes."</p>
<p>He opened <em>Ladybug Knight</em> and began to read.</p>
<p> </p>
<p> </p>
<p> </p>
<p> </p>
<p> </p>
<p> </p>
<p> </p>
<p> </p>
<p> </p>
<p> </p>
<p>Everyone ate lunch outside. There were a few picnic tables, and some quilts laid out in the grass, under the shade from the maple and cherry trees. Children sat scattered about in haphazard little clumps, talking with their mouths full and gesturing wildly as they no doubt told intricate and imaginative stories.</p>
<p>Jisu sat near a particularly large group, and Jaemin was somewhat nearby, in the middle of a clump of about ten children, all between the ages of five and eight.</p>
<p>Soobin had situated himself directly under a tree, leaning against its trunk and basking in the soft shadows it provided in the slight heat of early June. He'd rolled his shirtsleeves up and loosened his navy blue tie, and hummed to himself as he ate dried salmon with crackers. The grass rustled with footsteps and he looked up to see Kai standing in front of him, shifting nervously on his feet.</p>
<p>"Huening-ssi," Soobin made an effort to swallow the food in his mouth before continuing. "Would you like to sit with me?"</p>
<p>Kai smiled and let out a breathy laugh. "Yes, yes. Thanks." He dropped to his knees at an angle from Soobin. "I, uh... I didn't want to just sit alone, but you're really the only one I know, you know?" He grimaced at the words leaving his mouth. Crossed his legs and twisted a loose string from the hem of his jeans between his fingers. "I hope I'm not bothering you."</p>
<p>"Of course not." Soobin shook his head. "I don't mind at all. But... tell me..." He paused, sweeping his eyes over Kai. "Do you have anything to eat?"</p>
<p>Kai's face scrunched up—wrinkled nose, twisted mouth and crinkled eyebrows. He looked cute. "I forgot to pack it—I had a hectic morning. Half my stuff is in boxes so it's like—" He caught himself rambling and bit back his sentence, face reddening. "Sorry. You probably don't wanna hear about my weird personal stuff." He scratched the back of his neck.</p>
<p>"I take it you've recently moved?" Soobin pushed his package of salmon toward Kai. "And, please, share with me. I've been eating nothing but dried fish for lunch for a week. I'm trying to get rid of it."</p>
<p>Kai wanted to protest, but Soobin only pushed the food more insistently toward him, so he gave in with an embarrassed grin and soft, "Thanks." He nibbled on a piece of fish for a moment before saying, "You're right, though. I just moved into town a few days ago, actually." He shrugged. "Seoul was neat and all, but I felt like I needed a change. You know?"</p>
<p>"I do. I've done the same thing." Soobin smiled. "Also, welcome to town. I hope you like it here."</p>
<p>Kai nodded. "It's different… but nice."</p>
<p>They ate in silence for a few more minutes, until Soobin spoke again.</p>
<p>"I'm sorry if the children overwhelmed you, earlier. The third graders can be very... excitable."</p>
<p>Kai laughed. "No, no." He gnawed on a piece of salmon. "To be honest, I'm always kind of overwhelmed, so I don't mind so much. Helps that kids are adorable."</p>
<p>"It does." Soobin nodded.</p>
<p>More silence, filled in with the sound of crunching crackers and crinkling wrappers.</p>
<p>Kai plucked a blade of grass from a spot near his hip and twirled it between his fingers. Soobin watched him curiously, while he drank from a steel water bottle. Kai poked the tip of his finger with the end of the grass so that the little blade bent this way and that. He let it flutter back down to the ground and stretched his legs out—the sunlight landed on his shins—and leaned back on his palms.</p>
<p>"So," He watched the children, all eating or running around under the watchful eyes of their teachers. "What are the classes you teach, exactly?" He shot Soobin a glance.</p>
<p>Soobin closed the top on his box of crackers and finished chewing before he responded. "I teach Korean and History—Reading, grammar and spelling. The basics." He shifted where he sat against the tree trunk. "You saw the third graders in the morning, and the second graders after that. I teach the first graders after lunch and then school's out."</p>
<p>"So do you teach in like... cycles?"</p>
<p>Soobin nodded. "Jisu does math and science, and Jaemin does music and art in the library upstairs. We rotate so I have third, she has second, and he has first, and then second and first and third, and so on."</p>
<p>Kai hummed. "That's an interesting way to do it. How many students are there?"</p>
<p>"Thirty."</p>
<p>Kai set his full attention on Soobin, incredulous. "Only thirty?!"</p>
<p>Another nod, with amusement clear in Soobin's gray eyes. "We're a small town."</p>
<p>"I guess so..." Kai let his hands slide back, and lay down in the grass, looking up at the sky. "I'm used to so many more people but... I think I could like a small town like this." He turned his head to look at Soobin. His smile was pretty.</p>
<p>Soobin gave him a tiny smile back. "I hope you do."</p>
<p>"I hope so too."</p>
<p> </p>
<p> </p>
<p> </p>
<p> </p>
<p> </p>
<p> </p>
<p> </p>
<p> </p>
<p> </p>
<p> </p>
<p>Kai left his motorcycle propped up in his carport. He would have liked to be able to put it in a garage, really, but with a town this small he figured it wouldn't get stolen. Probably. Hopefully. Anyway, the duplex didn't have a garage. Just a kind of shaded concrete area like a driveway.</p>
<p>He pulled his helmet off as he walked inside, and dropped his bag to the floor. Shut the door and leaned against it with a sigh. Closed his eyes. He liked reading to kids, but he'd be a filthy liar if he didn't admit it drained him—mentally, physically, emotionally. He needed either a great deal of coffee, a grape juice, or a lot of egg tarts and maybe also mac and cheese.</p>
<p>He opted for all four. Stood over the stove watching the water boil while his coffee maker made little popping noises. When it finished, he poured the coffee into a mug—which he scrounged from a box in the kitchen—and augmented it with a little bit of rum he'd found in his cooking supplies the other day. As for the mac and cheese... Well, he set the saucepan on a potholder on the floor, sitting in front of it, and ate directly from the pan.</p>
<p>Afterward, feeling a little too warm through a combination of the sunlight filling his house and the hot food and rum, Kai decided he would take a nap.</p>
<p>He woke to the sunset shooting its pink and gold rays through the bedroom window, head throbbing.</p>
<p>"Damn."</p>
<p>His phone buzzed in his pocket, and he sat up on his mattress—settled on the bare floorboards, because he hadn't gotten around to setting up the frame yet. He fumbled for his phone. Accidentally dropped it. He cursed and grabbed it from the floor, sliding it open. One missed message from his dad. He let out a groan. Hit speed dial—and, yes, he had his father on speed dial—and waited for less than one ring before his father picked up.</p>
<p>"Ningning!" His dad sounded pleased and relieved. "I was worried. I tried calling you twice but you didn't answer, and I thought maybe you got hit off your motorcycle."</p>
<p>Rolling onto his stomach, Kai laughed a little. "Dad, I'm fine. I was just taking a nap."</p>
<p>"Oh, good. How are you settling in over there? When can I visit you and embarrass you in front of all the new friends you'll be making?"</p>
<p>Kai rolled his eyes. "Like I said—I'm fine. And I dunno that there'll be a whole lot of friends to really embarrass me in front of. It's so small here. I met a couple of people, when I did a reading at the elementary school—there are only thirty students!" He stuck his face in his pillow for half a second before murmuring, "One of the teachers there is pretty nice. I—I mean, I'm sure they're all nice but he just... I dunno."</p>
<p>His dad laughed, and then said, "So, you're telling me you have a crush?"</p>
<p>"No! <em>Dad!</em>" Kai wrinkled his nose. "God, I don't even <em>need</em> friends for you to embarrass me."</p>
<p>More laughter. Then a quiet pause where Kai heard his dad breathe for a moment before asking, "For real, though. You sure you're okay? If you need me, ever, you know you can call, right?" Another pause. "I worry about you, far away from me in a strange place."</p>
<p>"Dad, I'm a whole twenty year old. I'm okay. I'm fine."</p>
<p>"Okay, if you're so fine, what did you eat today?"</p>
<p>Kai closed his eyes with a sigh. "Um... I had some coffee." He rubbed his hand over his face. "And I just had some more coffee with uh... with grape juice. And eggtarts. And mac and cheese."</p>
<p>"Is that all? What about lunch? Did you actually eat anything other than noodles?"</p>
<p>"...I had some crackers and dried fish one of the teachers at the school offered me. I forgot to bring my own lunch."</p>
<p>His father scoffed and said, "You may be twenty year old now but you're still terrible at taking care of yourself." There was rustling from the end of the line, and Kai assumed his father had sat down. "Kai, I know you're a grown-ass man, but you're still my little boy and I do worry about you. You need to eat more than just coffee, grape juice, egg tarts and macaroni."</p>
<p>Kai rested his cheek against his pillow, letting his phone balance precariously on his face as he dropped his hand over the edge of the bed. "I know, I'm terrible." He tapped his fingertips against the floor. "I'll go to the grocery store or something. I don't know. I have a headache and a million boxes to unpack and it's stuffy in here. Maybe if I just get some air—walk on the beach or something. I mean I came here to get away from all the crowds and pollution and broken windows in Seoul. The least I can do is take a walk."</p>
<p>"Drink some water, and then go take a walk. And if you're really having trouble with anything, call me. Okay?"</p>
<p>"Okay." Kai grabbed his phone off of his face and rolled onto his back. "Okay, I'll call you. I'm gonna go now. Bye."</p>
<p>"Bye, Kai. Love you, buddy."</p>
<p>"Yeah. Yeah, I love you too, Dad."</p>
<p>Kai snapped his phone shut and set it on his chest. He stared up at the ceiling for a while, lit by the dim setting sun. It was almost dark out. Kai sighed, and pulled himself out of bed. His phone dropped to the floor with a thud, again, and he closed his eyes. "God." He bent over to pick it up and slipped it into his pocket, hoping it wasn't broken.</p>
<p>He slipped on his shoes and grabbed one of his cloth grocery bags—he owned three—and made sure his keys were in his pocket before stepping out onto the carport. He shivered a little. It may have been June, and generally warm, but with the sunlight fading and the breeze off the water it was actually just a little chilly. Not enough to be unpleasant though. It was nice. Though maybe he should have grabbed a thin sweatshirt. He shrugged, and set off down the road.</p>
<p>Rather than go immediately to the grocery store, Kai headed to the beach.</p>
<p>On the sand, he hunched his shoulders and shoved his hands into his pockets. Definitely should have worn his sweatshirt. The wind pushed at his hair. He closed his eyes and breathed deep. The air smelled salty and clean and a little smoky. He opened his eyes and glanced around, curious.</p>
<p>A few hundred feet away, on a higher part of the beach, an orange house—the color of easy mac, Kai thought—sat, surrounded by an unpainted wooden fence. Out in front of it, down an incline, in the sand, someone stood beside the source of a long curl of white smoke. They moved around a little bit, and dumped sand on what Kai assumed was a little bonfire. Smoke and dust puffed out into the air. The person disappeared around the side of the house, then reappeared with a bucket. They dumped water over the spot as well. They noticed Kai, and set off down the beach toward him.</p>
<p>Kai froze where he stood. Whoever it was probably wouldn't appreciate his obvious staring. He panicked a little and turned around, ducking his head and turning back in the direction he'd come. He stumbled a little, as he scurried up the slope of the sand to the road.</p>
<p>"Wait!"</p>
<p>It was a man. Familiar-sounding.</p>
<p>Kai turned. "Oh—!" He tripped backwards on a clump of weeds and landed on his ass in the sand. Caught himself with one hand on the sidewalk right alongside him, and winced. "<em>Shit</em>." He lay back against the ground with a grimace, embarrassed beyond belief. "Hi, Soobin-ssi."</p>
<p>Soobin looked down at him, hands in his jacket pockets, barely smiling. "Hello, Huening-ssi." He freed a hand and held it out for Kai to take.</p>
<p>"Hi—sorry. I already said that." Kai grasped Soobin's hand and let himself be pulled to his feet. "Um. Thanks?" He shrugged and crossed his arms, looking away. At the waves.</p>
<p>Shaking his head, Soobin said, "You're welcome. You should be more careful." He slipped his hand back into its pocket. "Why were you running, anyway?"</p>
<p>"I was uh—embarrassed." Kai scrunched his face up, and kicked at the sand. "'Cause you saw me watching you—I didn't know it was you. I just. Saw the smoke. I was curious." He shivered a little, as the wind picked up again. "Sorry."</p>
<p>"Why are you apologizing?" Soobin shook his head. "You didn't do anything. You could have hurt yourself though." He gestured with his head toward the sidewalk.</p>
<p>Kai nodded. "Yeah. Uh, sorr—shit, um. I mean, sorry." Kai pulled a face. "Dammit."</p>
<p>Soobin smiled a little wider, and held his hand out again. "Don't be so hard on yourself. Come on." He nodded toward the beach. "I'll show you something."</p>
<p>"I—okay. Okay." Kai took Soobin's hand and followed Soobin down the sand. The heat between their palms made Kai's hand sweat, and he could have kicked himself for being such a <em>dork</em>. He focused on trying not to trip again, instead, and hoped Soobin wouldn't be grossed out by his most-definitely damp hand.</p>
<p>The sand shifted under his shoes and he frowned. The wind picking up little grains and sending them flying into his face didn't help, either. "What are you gonna show me?" Hopefully Soobin wasn't secretly a murderer or something terrible. Maybe he knew where a wave pool was.</p>
<p>"Just wait," Soobin said, and tugged more insistently. Like a little kid.</p>
<p>Kai nodded.</p>
<p>Pretty soon, a barking sound could be heard. Kai began to walk faster, pulling up level with Soobin. "Are you serious?" He grinned, as they crested a little hill of sand and weeds.</p>
<p>The beach grew rockier as it stretched away, and about a hundred feet away, a group of harbor seals and more than a few pups lay on the shore. Soobin stopped walking, so Kai stopped as well and looked at the seals from afar. He realized his hand was still joined with Soobin's, and blushed, dropping it to his side and rubbing his palm on his jeans. Soobin just smiled minutely and gazed out over the beach.</p>
<p>"Aren't they cute?"</p>
<p>Kai squinted. "Well, yeah, but I can't see them very well." His mouth twisted. He'd left his glasses on the windowsill by his bed like the idiot he was. "Can we go closer?"</p>
<p>"A little bit." Soobin grabbed his elbow and pulled him down the hill until they were only about fifty feet away. He glanced at Kai. "Is that better? I know it's dark, but we're not allowed to go closer." He seemed distressed at the idea that Kai might not be able to see them as well as he'd like.</p>
<p>Kai huffed out a little laugh, and grinned at his feet. He raised his head and looked at the seals. "That's better." He crossed his arms, shivering a little now that the sun had gone done almost completely—only a little sliver of yellowy-orange light on the horizon was left. The stars had begun to come out.</p>
<p>Soobin turned to him, with a downward turn to his mouth. "Are you cold?"</p>
<p>"No! No, I'm not—maybe a little bit." Kai scratched the back of his neck. Soobin began to pull his jacket off, and Kai reached out with wide eyes. "Don't—I don't need your jacket! I'm fine, I swear!" He let his hand rest briefly on Soobin's elbow before pulling his arm back like he'd been burned. "I'm fine."</p>
<p>"No," Soobin shook his head and shrugged the rest of the way out of his jacket. "Your arms are covered in goosebumps." He reached around and slung the charcoal-colored coat around Kai's shoulders, and smoothed down the collar. "Let me walk you home." He smiled. "It's dark. We don't want you to hurt yourself if you can't see something." He led Kai back in the direction they had come.</p>
<p>Kai glared at him, as they walked, half-offended. "I'm not <em>blind!</em>"</p>
<p>"My apologies." Soobin chuckled. "Watch out for that piece of driftwood."</p>
<p>Kai stumbled over the chunk of wood, but Soobin steadied him, with a smug smile fixed on his lips. "Careful."</p>
<p>"I'm being careful." Kai tugged away from Soobin.</p>
<p>Soobin laughed and followed closely after him, bare feet silent in the sand compared to Kai's noisy scraping. "Still..." He looked up at the sky, where the stars peeked out much more thickly. "Even <em>I</em> hurt myself, sometimes. And I live on the beach." He let his hand drift near Kai's lower back, almost touching but not quite.</p>
<p>"Oh, right. That orange house?" Kai glanced over his shoulder at Soobin. "It's cute. Do you live alone?" He frowned cutely. "That's not really any of my business, huh?"</p>
<p>Soobin shook his head. He pulled forward, a little more level with Kai, and his hand pressed warm against Kai's back. He watched the sea as he walked. "I live alone." His eyes went back to Kai. They looked silver in the moonlight. He tilted his head. "What about you?"</p>
<p>"Me?"</p>
<p>"Do you live alone?" Soobin raised his eyebrows, and turned a little, steering Kai toward the sidewalk, now that they were on the sandier area of the beach.</p>
<p>Kai nodded. "I do." When his feet touched the concrete he pulled a little bit away from Soobin.</p>
<p>"Where?"</p>
<p>"Why?"</p>
<p>"Well," Soobin tried not to smirk, but failed pretty miserably. "You know where I live, and I <em>am</em> walking you home."</p>
<p>Blushing, Kai looked away. "Right." He pulled his—no, Soobin's—jacket tighter about himself. He scuffed his shoe along the sidewalk. "I live just down that street." He paused, and before Soobin could say anything, exclaimed, "Shit! I need to go to the store!" He stopped walking. "I don't know where the store is."</p>
<p>"I can show you..." Soobin scratched the back of his leg with his toes.</p>
<p>Kai looked at him. "Would you?" His forehead crinkled. "I can make you dinner or something, to say thanks."</p>
<p>Soobin began to walk down the sidewalk. His calves were caked with sand, Kai noticed—now that he could see him clearer in the light from the streetlamps. He looked over his shoulder at Kai and said, "You don't have to do anything for me, but I certainly won't turn down a meal." And there was that soft smile again. The kind Kai's dad liked to call a "Mona Lisa smile."</p>
<p>"Well, then... I insist!" Kai scurried forward to catch up with Soobin. "You've been so helpful even though you only just met me this morning. I have to do <em>something</em>. It's the least I can do." He fell into step beside Soobin and grinned at him.</p>
<p>Soobin caught his eye. "Well, then... I accept your invitation." His eyes twinkled.</p>
<p>Kai looked down at the sidewalk.</p>
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<p>"So, you don't eat any meat other than fish?" Kai moved to take Soobin's plate, but Soobin turned the tables on him and took <em>Kai's</em> plate instead, taking them both to the sink. Kai glared at him half-heartedly. "I was gonna clean those."</p>
<p>Soobin ran the water and began to scrub at their used dishes. "I'll clean them instead. You cooked, so you shouldn't clean." He paused, focusing on a particularly stubborn piece of cheese that had melted and then dried on the very edge of one plate. Once satisfied he'd scrubbed it into oblivion, he shot over his shoulder, "And yes, I only eat seafood, as far as meat goes."</p>
<p>"Not even like... beef?"</p>
<p>"Especially not beef." Soobin smiled.</p>
<p>Kai nodded. "No, I guess that would be like cannibalism."</p>
<p>Soobin paused. He looked over his shoulder at Kai, who sat at the table with a cheeky grin and a red face. He tilted his head. Turned back to the dishes with a tiny little smirk. "Are you flirting with me, Huening-ssi?"</p>
<p>"Maybe?" Kai pouted, folding his arms on the tabletop and resting his head against them.</p>
<p>"Well, I'm flattered that you equate me with beef, but really when you put it like that it sounds like you're calling me a cow."</p>
<p>He whined. "You're ruining the moment."</p>
<p>"Am I?" Soobin set both plates in the dish rack beside the sink and shut the water off as he turned around to face Kai. He wiped his wet hands on his jeans and crossed his arms. "I didn't know there was a moment. I thought it was more like a split second of a terrible pickup line." He seemed to be smiling, but... as usual, it wasn't clear. Kai just couldn't tell, with that slight curve of the mouth.</p>
<p>Kai sighed. "It wasn't <em>that</em> bad, was it?"</p>
<p>"No." Soobin moved toward the table and sat down. "It was cute. The most confusing way to call me a beefcake you could possibly have come up with." He leaned his elbows against the tabletop.</p>
<p>"Ah."</p>
<p>Soobin nodded.</p>
<p>Kai ran his hand back through his hair and scratched his neck, looking up at Soobin a little crookedly from where he leaned his head on his arm. He smiled, and glanced away. "I thought you were kinda scary when I first saw you—since you're all serious and quiet and... well endowed—but you know... You're not very scary at all." He wrinkled his nose. "You're like a garden snake. You seem threatening but you're not."</p>
<p>"I thought I was a beef cow." Soobin raised his eyebrows. "And I can be very scary, thank you very much."</p>
<p>Kai snorted. "You're wearing a Henley with suspenders and rolled up jeans. You look like a <em>farmer</em>."</p>
<p>"I take offense at that." Soobin leaned back in his chair, crossing his arms. "I prefer the term 'hipster fisherman.'"</p>
<p>"What?" Kai snorted. He sat up and crossed his ankles. "You're weird."</p>
<p>Soobin eyed him, still wearing that maybe-smile. "Am <em>I</em> the weird one? You write books about talking bugs and fruits and you made me a grilled macaroni and cheese sandwich for dinner."</p>
<p>"Hey now! My daddy taught me to make that." Kai kicked at Soobin under the table. "And practically all kids' books are about talking animals. As an elementary school teacher you oughta know that."</p>
<p>"I suppose you're right. What about the fruits, though?" Soobin pushed his chair back from the table and stood. Kai stubbornly refused to answer. "Anyway, I should be going. It's late." He glanced down at himself, and tugged on his suspenders before turning away and saying, "These are considered cool, by the way." He made his way into the hallway.</p>
<p>Kai scrambled to his feet and followed him. "Hang on, I'm supposed to show you out!" He ran up and caught the door just as Soobin was opening it. He shut it and slid between it and Soobin. "My job as your host is to show you the door." He grinned, pushing Soobin away enough to open the door himself. "It was lovely having you over, Soobin. I hope to see you soon." He half-bowed, trying not to laugh.</p>
<p>"Indeed. I imagine we'll meet soon enough." Soobin smirked, and took Kai's hand in his own. He bent to press a kiss to his knuckles. Straightened and stepped out onto the carport. "Goodnight."</p>
<p>"Uh—" Kai blinked. "Goodnight!"</p>
<p>He watched Soobin walk away, and tried to ignore the blush creeping up the back of his neck. He shut the door when Soobin disappeared into the shadows between two streetlamps. Leaned against it and stood for a moment in his dark hallway. He looked down at his shoes.</p>
<p>"Wait." He made a scrunched up face. "Did he—Who <em>does</em> that?!" He couldn't help but grin, though. Glanced at his knuckles. "Kissed my hand. Stupid." He made his way into the other room, giddy all the while.</p>
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<p>Soobin paused just outside his door, with the lavender brushing up to his knees in the sea breeze. He shook his head, and left the fragrant flowers behind, slipping into his house and muttering, "I left my coat." He didn't bother to lock his door. Just shut it with his heel and wiped his sandy feet off on the doormat, and padded across the bare wood boards toward the ceiling-high bank of shelves that held his books and music. He flicked through his records until he found one he liked, and put it on the white turntable he kept on one of the more spacious shelves—where most people would keep a television.</p>
<p>He let the needle fall where it would, which happened to be halfway through "Title and Registration." He smiled to himself and moved to the couch (dark brown and plain), reaching for his white wicker basket full of sewing projects. Found an embroidery hoop with a piece of fabric stretched between it with half of a windblown tree cross-stitched into it. He pulled the pattern out from where he'd stashed it, flattening it out on his knee, and stared at both the paper and the fabric for a few minutes.</p>
<p>Eventually, he settled more comfortably against the arm of the couch, knees up, and went about his embroidery.</p>
<p>He fell into the familiar routine of threading the needle back and forth, leaving behind his little trail of x-shaped stitches as he sang under his breath. It was a nighttime ritual, for him. Every night before bed he would work on some kind of embroidery project and often listen to music while he did so. Sometimes he lay in bed while he stitched, sometimes on the couch. Sometimes it was at nine pm just after he'd brushed his teeth, other times at three in the morning when he couldn't sleep.</p>
<p>Other nights, like this one, he fell asleep with the hoop in his lap, to the sound of the record player's needle scratching across vinyl.</p>
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<p>The next morning, Kai woke earlier than usual, and decided it would be a good day to write. He wandered downstairs. Found Soobin's jacket on the kitchen table.</p>
<p>Kai held out the gray twill work coat. He sighed. "He did this on purpose because he knew I'd have to give it back." He rolled his eyes and draped the jacket over his arm, as he headed for the front door. He stopped briefly in the hallway to shoved the coat into his bag alongside his laptop, and readjusted his hoodie under the strap as he walked outside.</p>
<p>The weather was nice that day. Mild. Drizzling lightly, but warm and still sunny in patches so that the light colored everything a little golden and a little purple in sheer bars from between the clouds. He closed his eyes against the soft rain for a moment and breathed in the clean air. He cinched his bag tighter around his shoulders and buckled the extra strap underneath his armpit to stabilize it against his back, and shoved his helmet onto his head.</p>
<p>His bike started cleanly, and its red paint flashed in the filtered sunlight.</p>
<p>As he rode through town he realized he probably should have stopped at Soobin's house first to give him his jacket, but... too late. He'd already made it out of the city limits (not that it took much) and had started off toward an area he'd begun to make a habit of frequenting in the past few days.</p>
<p>It was just an unassuming little copse of trees, from the outside. He parked his bike just out of sight in the undergrowth and made his way between narrow trunks until it opened up into a clearing full of forget-me-nots. They carpeted the ground in blue, though they thinned out nearer the center of the little clearing. They seemed thickest around the edge of the trees, in the half-light. He sat in the middle of it all, in the shifting sunlight and barely-there rain, and pulled his laptop and lunchbox out of his messenger bag. Opened both, and started his computer while he opened a little Tupperware container of grapes.</p>
<p>He chewed on them absently, and hummed to himself.</p>
<p>Battery life: five and a half hours.</p>
<p>So he would give himself four and a half, since the computer usually died faster than it said it would.</p>
<p>He opened the proper word document for his current project. He skimmed over some of what he'd typed up to refresh his memory, and began to write. Every once in a while he ate a handful of grapes, until they were gone. Then he switched over to the crackers. Continued to tap away at his keyboard.</p>
<p>The only time he interrupted himself was after writing about ten thousand words, because he needed to pee. So he relieved himself in the bushes, and returned to writing.</p>
<p>After a while, though, clouds blanketed the sky completely—low-hanging and dark, bruised with black and violet and deep blue, edged in silver and white. Fat drops of rain fell at random. Splattered Kai's computer, and his glasses. His sweatshirt too. The forget-me-nots nodded under the slowly increasing fall.</p>
<p>He let out a breath. Time to go home early, he supposed. And with a full hour of battery life still left. He saved everything and shut his computer down. Packed everything up and shoved it into his bag. Strapped it to himself. Fully ready to leave.</p>
<p>Kai rode slower than usual, in the growing rain. Didn't want to crash, after all. His father would worry himself sick if that happened, and Kai didn't want to make his dad sick. So he was careful. Sensible. Only went over the speed limit like... <em>once</em>.</p>
<p>He stopped at his duplex, parking his bike under the carport, and immediately began to walk toward the beach.</p>
<p>It was fully raining, at that point. Big round drops plunging down from the sky, slightly warm and dampening the ground instantly. Kai glanced up at the purple clouds and quickened his step. The breeze picked up, flicking grains of sand up into his face, and he glared at the ground. Broke into a run when the rain shifted into a heavy downpour—much less friendly and fat, and much more harsh and driving. Also a little sideways, thanks to the wind off the ocean. Kai swore, and scurried down the slope of the beach toward Soobin's house.</p>
<p>The orange paint practically glowed in the strangely dank lighting, and Kai was reminded of both a fluorescent construction sign and a poppy, diluted with cream.</p>
<p>He almost trampled some lavender on his way to the front door. It rustled around his legs and he hopped over a clump sprouting from between the gravel making up the walkway. He knocked on the white door hard enough to hurt his knuckles. The rain, at that point, had soaked his back and hair.</p>
<p>For a few minutes, no one answered, but just when Kai began to think he'd be left on the doorstep in the pouring rain, Soobin peeked out.</p>
<p>When he saw Kai, Soobin smiled. If a very slight curvature of the mouth can truly be called a smile. "Huening-ssi," he stepped back and pulled the door further open. "Please, come in."</p>
<p>Kai stepped in, a little nervously. "I brought your jacket. It's in my bag." He noticed Soobin wore no shoes, but blue and white striped socks covered his feet. His pants weren't rolled up, though the long sleeves of his thermal shirt were—up to the elbows. Kai glanced down at his feet. "Should I—" A pause. "Should I take my shoes off? I mean, they're all muddy." He looked back up at Soobin, who seemed at least somewhat amused.</p>
<p>"Take them off." Soobin backed away. "And take off your coat. We'll put them in front of the fire to dry." He turned to the fireplace—little warm flames already popped in the grate, and a kettle hung over them.</p>
<p>Kai followed Soobin, shoes in hand. "That's pretty old fashioned." He nodded at the kettle, as it began to whistle.</p>
<p>"Hm?" Soobin glanced to the fire. "Ah, yes. Yes, I'm fond of more... antiquated... things." He stuck his hand in an oven mitt—navy blue with a white anchor emblazoned on the back—and took the kettle off the fire. He sat it on a cast iron trivet on a small wooden table beside the couch.</p>
<p>"So you really <em>are</em> a hipster." Kai stripped down to his t-shirt.</p>
<p>Soobin rolled his eyes and took Kai's jacket from him. "Perhaps." He laid it out on the hearth, not near enough to the heat that it would catch fire. He set Kai's sneakers a little closer. "Anyhow," He moved toward his tall bookshelf and flipped the record sitting on its turntable. "How was your day? You look like a drowned mouse."</p>
<p>"Isn't it supposed to be 'drowned rat'?"</p>
<p>Soobin laughed quietly and turned to face Kai once more, as quiet music filled the room. "I think you're more of a little brown mouse than a big rat. You're all jumpy and cute." He made a round shape with his hands, as if to demonstrate the diminutiveness of a mouse. He smiled.</p>
<p>"I'm not a mouse." Kai pulled a face and set his bag down beside the couch, unstrapping the flap and dragging Soobin's jacket from its depths. He shook it out, frowning at the creases it had sustained from being rolled into a ball and shoved into a messenger bag. It continued to be wrinkly at him. "Sorry it's all messed up." He held it out.</p>
<p>With a soft noise, in-between a laugh and a sigh, Soobin reached for it. He draped it over the back of the couch and said, quietly, "It's just a work jacket. I don't mind if it's a little rumpled." He moved around the far side of the couch and sat down on the cushions. The springs—it was an old couch—creaked when he moved. He patted the space beside him. "Sit down. Relax." His eyes reflected the light from the fire and turned a little golden with it. He turned his attention to the kettle, still steaming on the side table. Briefly excused himself, and was back within a few seconds carrying a bone china tea set, a little tin, and some milk, and went about actually making tea—loose leaf and everything.</p>
<p>Kai watched him, curiously. "Pretty fancy," he muttered.</p>
<p>"Hm?" Soobin glanced up at him, half-distracted with his task. "Oh. Yes. It was my mother's." Rather than return the kettle to the fire he just set it nearby, on the hearth, which was probably a terribly uncouth thing to do but he didn't seem to care. He just covered the teapot with a hand-knit cozy and sat down again. "She always drank tea, three times a day. I got into the habit when I was a teenager and she showed me how to make it 'proper.'" He shook his head. "After our dad left, though... She stopped."</p>
<p>"Oh." Kai frowned to himself, feeling as if maybe Soobin hadn't meant to be quite so open. "I'm sorry about that. Um—do you have siblings? Since you said, 'our' and not 'my,' I mean." He twiddled his thumbs in his lap. Before Soobin replied, he murmured, "I'm sorry. That's none of my business."</p>
<p>Soobin shook his head again, but in a more amused way. "I don't mind, really." He smiled at Kai, and leaned back against the couch, closing his eyes. "I have a few older brothers, an ex-brother in law, and a lot of cousins." He gave a smooth shrug. "What about you?"</p>
<p>"No." Kai looked down at his hands in his lap, and made himself stop fiddling with his fingers. "Just me and my dad for as long as I can remember"</p>
<p>"No mom?"</p>
<p>Kai shrugged noncommittally. "I don't remember her. Dad never really talks about her, ever. All I know is she left a long time ago—maybe she died, or maybe she didn't want to be a mom or maybe she <em>did</em>, but didn’t want me weighing her down... Maybe they got divorced when I was a baby. I don't know. But I'm fine with my dad, and sometimes he had help, when he occasionally met decent men." He laughed quietly, and stretched his legs out.</p>
<p>Soobin hummed thoughtfully. "I see."</p>
<p>Feeling a little nervous, suddenly, Kai hunched his shoulders. He watched Soobin, who leaned away and poured milk into the teacups, before uncovering the teapot and pouring tea into both of the little white cups. He handed one, steaming, to Kai. Kai held the saucer as steady as he could in one hand, and the cup in the other. He felt as though, any second, the two might clatter together like in movies when a character is frightened. They didn't, though. He poked at the tea with the tip of his tongue, and winced. Hot. Right. Better to wait for the tea to cool a little bit.</p>
<p>"How are you doing, by the way?" Soobin seemed not to mind the scalding heat of his own tea, as he sipped at it. "With the unpacking, and writing..." An 'et cetera' seemed to be implied as he trailed off.</p>
<p>The sofa squeaked, as Kai shifted. He breathed in the steam from his tea. "Um... book's doing okay." He shrugged and dared to take a small sip from his cup. Grimaced. He didn't really like tea much, even with milk. "I wrote today, a bit."</p>
<p>"Really?" Soobin seemed intrigued. He scratched the tip of his nose, and looked at Kai. "What about?"</p>
<p>Another shrug, and Kai set his tea, very carefully, on the floor near his feet. He made a little thoughtful noise in his throat. "Well, there's a snake. Her name is Cherry, and she doesn't have any friends... 'cause everyone's scared of her, you know?" He scratched at his chin. "She's a snake! With fangs, and venom, and all that stuff that makes snakes scary, right? Except she's only a little garden snake, so she's really harmless." He let out a huff, picking at the hem of his shirt.</p>
<p>Soobin, whose attention was focused solely on Kai, tilted his head. He blinked, and asked, "What happens?"</p>
<p>"Hm?" Kai rubbed his face. "Oh, I'm not 100% sure yet, but I think she'll make friends with someone. I mean, it's not quite as simple as that—it's supposed to be a longer story. You know, elementary level chapter book." He met Soobin's eyes, with half of a smile. "My editor'll probably start bothering me about it soon, though, so I'll tell you then."</p>
<p>"Okay." Soobin smiled.</p>
<p>They fell into an easy silence, punctuated occasionally by the snap of the fire or the clink of teacup against saucer, filled out with the sound of the rain against the windows. It was warm, and cozy—maybe a little drafty, with how open Soobin's living room was, but the fire put out enough heat that it became a non-issue. Kai found himself drifting, snug and sleepy. He vaguely remembered being laid down on the couch and covered with a blanket, but it was all a little fuzzy.</p>
<p>He woke in semi-darkness, wrapped up in a soft quilt. The fire flickered low and outside, the rain seemed to beat even harder against everything. The sound of the waves, and the rain against the glass, and the wind as well, might have been what woke him. He looked around. An embroidery hoop lay abandoned on the floor near a little basket, but Soobin was nowhere in sight. Kai sat up, drawing the blanket a little closer about his shoulders. The air was much colder now that the fire had gone out, and it smelled a little like fish and lemons.</p>
<p>Just when he began to think maybe Soobin had left, a tall and narrow wooden door opened up across the room, and Soobin appeared. Kai glanced what must have been a kitchen just before the door swung shut.</p>
<p>"Your hair is sticking up." Soobin adjusted his hold on the two plates he carried. "And it's seven o'clock, so I made dinner."</p>
<p>Kai's stomach chose that moment to growl very loudly, and he blushed, ducking his head. "You shouldn't have—I mean..." He ran his hand through his hair. "Thank you?"</p>
<p>"You're welcome." Soobin held out a plate—salmon and rice. Very simple. He sat on the floor in front of the couch, and said, "You're not allowed to leave until the weather calms down."</p>
<p>Kai frowned. "I'm a grown-up! It's only a few blocks. I won't die if I try to walk home in the rain."</p>
<p>"No, but the wind might blow you away." Mischief glittered in Soobin's eyes, as his lips curved into that now-familiar secretive smile. "And where would you be, then? Probably in somewhere at the bottom of the ocean."</p>
<p>Rather than respond to Soobin's teasing, Kai began to eat. It was good. Not overdone, or undercooked. A little bland—but only a little bit, and Kai figured that was just because he was used to eating food with way too much salt. He ate quickly, and felt a little awkward when he sat with an empty plate while Soobin was barely halfway finished. He turned the fork—silvery and thin—around in his hand. Not actually silver. Stainless steel, like most utensils. It was embossed with a nice sunflower pattern on the end of the handle. He rand his thumb over it.</p>
<p>When Kai looked up from fiddling with the fork, he met with the sight of Soobin staring at him, amused and silent.</p>
<p>"What?" Kai couldn't help but grin, as his face flushed.</p>
<p>Soobin shook his head, still smiling that Archaic smile of his. "Nothing."</p>
<p>"What!" Kai laughed, and set his fork on his plate. "You can't just stare at me like that and say it's nothing! Is there something on my face? Did I do something silly?" He was grinning at that point, pink in the face and very warm all over.</p>
<p>"You were just very engrossed in that fork." Soobin leaned back on his hands, setting his nearly-empty plate on the floor beside his knee. He raised his eyebrows. "Is it a fascinating fork?"</p>
<p>Kai snorted, and settled with his elbows on his knees, hands hanging between. "The most fascinating fork I've ever seen." He glanced at Soobin, and mirrored his expression. Laced his fingers together and tilted his head to the side. "It's not the only fascinating thing I've seen today, though." He tried to keep a straight face, but almost broke out into laughter. He held it in until Soobin actually <em>grinned</em> and ducked his head, going red.</p>
<p>"Did I make you smile?" Kai laughed out loud and straightened up. "A full smile? Amazing! This might be the first time I've seen you make a face that doesn't make you look like an old painting!"</p>
<p>Soobin forced himself to frown, and glared completely unimpressively at Kai. "I didn't smile. It was a muscle spasm." He looked away, and it was clear he couldn't hold the serious expression—his façade cracked to show his soft grin, as he stared into the fire.</p>
<p>Leaning back against the couch cushions, Kai only said, "You're a terrible liar."</p>
<p>"Just because you saw something doesn't mean it happened."</p>
<p>Kai laughed again. "I beg to differ!"</p>
<p>"You can't beg to differ." Soobin finally turned his eyes back to Kai—they were the color of ash in the dim light from the fire. "It wasn't a smile. Just a temporary loss of control." He lay down on the ground and crossed his hands over his stomach, closing his eyes. His shirt rode up to show the thinnest sliver of skin. "I would never smile at something as ridiculous as your pickup lines. Except, perhaps, condescendingly."</p>
<p>"I still disagree."</p>
<p>Soobin scoffed. "Agree to disagree, then."</p>
<p>"Fine." Kai poked him with his toes. Soobin twitched, so Kai poked him again, right along the side of his ribcage. Soobin cracked one eye open and swatted at Kai's foot with an unconvincing glare. He ended up just settling his hand loosely about Kai's ankle, eyes closed once more. Kai didn't try to free his foot.</p>
<p>The rain continued to pound down outside—if anything it got stronger.</p>
<p>After a few minutes of silence, Kai opened his mouth again. "I don't think the storm is gonna let up anytime soon."</p>
<p>For a moment Soobin said nothing, and Kai wondered if he'd fallen asleep (with his hand still wrapped around Kai's ankle) but then he spoke. "The ocean is welcoming you with a freak summer storm." Almost immediately after he finished his sentence, the entire house lit up white with a flash of lightning.</p>
<p>Soobin lifted his head and narrowed his eyes at the window. Thunder boomed not three seconds later, and the glass rattled. The wind picked up enough to howl in the chimney, and the sound of the rain increased even more. He muttered, "If the house floods I'm suing someone."</p>
<p>"Flood—does your house usually flood when it rains?"</p>
<p>Soobin glanced at Kai before closing his eyes again. He tightened his grip on Kai's leg. "Not usually. Never, in fact. I just felt I ought to say that, just in case someone up there decided they'd like to have a little fun with the water."</p>
<p>Kai let out a disbelieving little snort. "I see."</p>
<p>"So..."</p>
<p>Kai leaned forward. "Yes?"</p>
<p>"You realize you're going to stay overnight, right?"</p>
<p>"Says who?" Kai shot Soobin a cross expression, but then he smiled. "The weather's not that bad."</p>
<p>As if to prove him wrong, another bolt of lightning flashed, and something clattered against the side of the house in a violent gust of wind. Soobin raised one eyebrow and smirked. "Says I. And the weather that is, in fact, awful." He sat up, finally moving his hand away from Kai's ankle, and rolled to his feet. "And I don't want you to get hit by a car or slip and crack your skull open or get washed away." He paused, hands on his hips. "What if there's a tsunami?"</p>
<p>"Well," Kai looked up at Soobin. "Then we would both die."</p>
<p>Soobin shook his head. "In that case, would you rather die with a handsome young man, or all alone in your duplex?"</p>
<p>Kai pretended to think for a moment. "You have a point, there."</p>
<p>"So you agree—I'm handsome."</p>
<p>"Handsome? Maybe." Kai grinned, and hauled himself to his feet. He shrugged. "You're definitely young."</p>
<p>“Maybe. But still older than you by miles.”</p>
<p>The wind rattled louder, with the thunder. Out the window the rain went sideways.</p>
<p>Soobin stretched his hands over his head and grimaced as his back popped. He stooped in front of the fireplace and banked the fire, shutting the glass doors before he turned back to Kai. "Since I work in the morning, I'm going to bed now. You can sleep on the couch, though I wouldn't recommend it. I've got a guest room but it's not furnished. Just a broken dresser and a bedframe." He crossed his arms. "So really, your options are... couch, wood floor, or my bed."</p>
<p>"Your bed—like... sharing?" Kai shoved his hands in his pockets and tried not to neither meet nor avoid Soobin's eyes.</p>
<p>"Yes." Soobin crouched briefly, to retrieve his plate, and grabbed Kai's from the couch as well. On his way to the kitchen, he said, "My bed is huge. So you don't need to worry about... I don't know... me accidentally crushing you in my sleep."</p>
<p>Kai lingered by the fireplace. "Would you?" he called. "Accidentally crush me in your sleep, I mean."</p>
<p>Soobin waited to reply until he'd reemerged from the kitchen. "No, I wouldn't." He moved toward the stairs—Kai hadn't noticed them, buried as they were in shadows and books—and beckoned Kai toward him. "I'm a very careful sleeper."</p>
<p>"Careful? Like, what? You wear protection in your sleep?" Kai paused. "That came out wrong."</p>
<p>"It really did." Soobin glanced over his shoulder as he crested the steps. He nodded toward the right, and disappeared into the darkness of the second floor.</p>
<p>Tentatively, Kai followed him. A light flicked on at the end of the hallway, and Soobin slipped through a doorway. Kai went after him, and found himself in a spacious bedroom lit by several bare bulbs hung from the ceiling. The floor was a light wood, and the walls as well. Though the floor, at least, had been stained a little, and looked smoother than the walls. One wide bay window was set into the far wall, and against the perpendicular wall was a bed—broad, sat on a wrought iron frame, covered with navy blue sheets and topped with two cream-colored pillows. Neat. Pristine, even.</p>
<p>Through the sheer curtains, lightning occasionally lit the room even brighter.</p>
<p>Kai poked around. A walk-in closet occupied the end of the room across from the bed. He looked up, and noticed that a few large windows took up the space beneath the ceiling. Kai wondered if the room had once been part of some studio. It certainly felt that way, with the high ceiling and pale woods and bright lighting. A studio that had been transformed into a bedroom, added onto, polished, but left a little bit rough around the edges. Like a gem with an imperfection.</p>
<p>"This is really nice." Kai wandered toward the bay window, at the head of the bed. He poked his head between the curtains and looked out at the twisting trees and diagonal sleet. "Your whole house is really nice, actually."</p>
<p>"Thank you."</p>
<p>Kai glanced around—Soobin stood near the closet, and was in the middle of pulling off his shirt. Kai looked away again, quickly, blushing. He focused his attention on a dark wooden crucifix hanging just beside the window, along with a sprig of dried lavender. Moved on past that. Every few feet hung a photograph framed in something made to look like cast iron. Photos of trees and waterfalls and the ocean and abandoned houses.</p>
<p>It was all very minimal and pleasing.</p>
<p>"You can borrow something to sleep in."</p>
<p>Kai turned, at the sound of Soobin's voice. He opened his mouth, and floundered. Soobin stood in a black wife-beater and slightly loose, dark gray flannel pants. Suffice it to say, the outfit flattered his form.</p>
<p>Kai cleared his throat. "Uh—if you have anything that would fit me, that'd be great."</p>
<p>Soobin nodded and turned back to his closet. He rummaged around through a few neatly folded piles of clothes on a knee level shelf. In doing so, he bent over and his shirt rode up, revealing the edge of some kind of tattoo. Kai chose not to think about it, lest he melt into a puddle of goo then and there.</p>
<p>"Here we go." Soobin came away with a pair of white and blue plaid pants and a matching shirt. "I've owned these since high school. I'm not sure why I still have them, but I guess they are really comfortable." He padded over to Kai, bare feet silent on the wood floor, and handed the pajamas to Kai.</p>
<p>"Thanks." Kai stood awkwardly in the middle of the bedroom. After a few seconds of hesitation, he asked, "Where's your bathroom?"</p>
<p>Soobin gestured toward the door. "Go back toward the stairs, and it's the door right by the landing, with the photo of a mountain hanging on it."</p>
<p>Kai hurried away to the bathroom to change and pee.</p>
<p>He stared at himself in the oval-shaped mirror for a while, ignoring the chill of the tiles against his feet. There were bags under his eyes. He ran a hand over his wild hair, and wondered if the scruffy hobo look suited him or if it might be getting a little out of hand. Well, it wasn't as though he could do anything about it in Soobin's house, in any case. He rubbed at his eyes with a sigh and left the bathroom, clothes in hand. The floorboards creaked.</p>
<p>As he opened his mouth to ask a question, lightning flashed and thunder followed in the split second afterward, so loud that the whole house shook. The lights flickered.</p>
<p>Kai stood very still in the middle of the bedroom. He cleared his throat. "Um—" He hugged his folded clothes to his chest. "If I accidentally kick you in my sleep will you throw me out into the storm?"</p>
<p>Snorting, Soobin walked past Kai and flicked the light switch, and the string lights edging the ceiling popped out. Shadows draped themselves across the room. "I don't care if you kick me." As Soobin walked past again, back toward the bed, Kai could have sworn he felt the other man's hand brush briefly over his arm, but couldn't be entirely sure.</p>
<p>He followed Soobin's silhouette to the bed.</p>
<p>Stumbled, when lightning turned everything stark and pale again. He blinked the afterimage away and found himself unable to see much at all. He set his clothes on the wooden chest at the foot of the bed and nearly fell onto the mattress—clambered on and almost put his hand in a very awkward place as he crawled up the sheets. Slowly, he began to be able to see more in the shadows. As he lay down, he could make out the shape of Soobin's profile in the dim, watery light filtering through the windows. But then another bright burst of light filled the room and he was blinded once again, while the windows rattled.</p>
<p>"I've never heard a storm this close."</p>
<p>Soobin shifted beside him and murmured, "Neither have I."</p>
<p>Kai nodded. "It's a little scary."</p>
<p>"It is."</p>
<p>"But I kinda like it."</p>
<p>"Yes."</p>
<p>Kai closed his eyes.</p>
<p>The sound of Soobin's breathing, the subtle smell of lemons, and the drum of the rain, and even the frequent grumble of thunder, lulled him to sleep.</p>
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<p>In the morning, the weather had died down. Sunlight sifted into the room through the windows near the ceiling, and streamed through the sheer curtains of the bay window. It lit everything with a soft golden color. A bar of it fell across Soobin's face, as the sun rose higher, and he frowned. He pulled himself up onto his elbows and reached through the iron bars of the headboard to part the curtains and peer out the window. Cloudless sky, with the rising sun dying the edges orange, pink and yellow. The sand and sidewalk were dark with the rain from the night before.</p>
<p>He let the curtain fall back in place, and lay back down. For once, he wished he'd invested in window coverings a little heavier than gauze.</p>
<p>Kai—still asleep—shifted toward him, with a quiet little sigh. Soobin moved to give him more space, but Kai sort of trailed after him with a tiny pout set on his face, and he grabbed Soobin's arm. Soobin smiled. He relaxed where he lay, with the sun streaming through the windows, and let Kai cling to him.</p>
<p>A quick glance at his watch (on the nightstand) confirmed it was only half-past five in the morning. He opened the drawer of the nightstand and rummaged blindly through it for his rosary. He was awake already anyway, so he figured he might as well say his prayers.</p>
<p>With his eyes closed, counting the beads between his fingers and mouthing the words to himself, he didn't notice Kai wake up.</p>
<p>It wasn't until he opened his eyes to find Kai staring at him that he realized.</p>
<p>"Good morning," he murmured.</p>
<p>Kai grimaced and shut his eyes. "It's too early." He let go of Soobin's arm and rolled onto his back. "Why don't you have curtains?"</p>
<p>"Well," Soobin set his rosary aside. "I normally wake with the sun. It's a healthy habit to keep, and most days I need to be up early for class anyway."</p>
<p>"But what about the weekends?"</p>
<p>"I usually fish in the mornings and go to the farmers' market in the afternoon." Soobin sat up, stretching his arms over his head. Something popped, and he grunted and rolled his shoulder. Returned his attention to Kai, who unabashedly stared at him from where he lay. Soobin raised an eyebrow. "Enjoying the view?"</p>
<p>Kai grinned. "Definitely."</p>
<p>"You're bold." Soobin stared back. "Are you ever going to make an effort to deny your attraction to me, or do you enjoy broadcasting it?"</p>
<p>"What can I say—I'm very confident in my sexuality." Kai looked away, then. "About the only thing I'm ever confident in, really." He frowned at the ceiling for a few seconds, then shrugged. "And I mean... I like to let people know if I'm interested—I don't want... misunderstandings. You know? I try to make it pretty black and white with people, because I don't want to be accused of—of leading someone on, or of anything else. I guess?" He sighed.</p>
<p>Soobin nodded. "That's admirable."</p>
<p>"Admirable—why do you always call me that? I'm not—I'm just... I'm just this guy, you know?"</p>
<p>"I disagree." Soobin moved to get out of bed, tossing the blankets aside. He adjusted his tank top, shook his arms out, and started to stretch. In between various contortions of his arms, he said, "I think that anyone who is able to do what they love is admirable." He smiled. "And I think you're admirable for being able to create things." He planted his hands on his hips and focused on Kai, expression thoughtful. "And I think it's admirable that you're so clear about what you feel."</p>
<p>Kai blushed and ducked his head, burying his face in one of Soobin's pillows. He mumbled something unintelligible, realized he couldn't be heard through several layers of fabric and stuffing, and raised his head to say, "Your existence is unfair."</p>
<p>"What on earth are you talking about?" Soobin bent down to touch his toes.</p>
<p>Kai definitely did not (no way, no how) stare at Soobin's butt while he said, "I'm talking about the fact that you're basically the perfect catch." He noticed a few lines of that tattoo again, in the sliver of open space between the hem of Soobin's shirt and the waistband of his briefs. He wondered what it might be. "I mean, you're cute <em>and</em> you have a nice body <em>and</em> you're sweet!"</p>
<p>"You think I'm sweet?"</p>
<p>Kai blinked. He frowned. "Well, yeah." He sat up, kicking off the blankets. "The kids seem to like you a lot, and you shared your lunch with me. And you walked with me to the store, and let me borrow your jacket, and you let me stay here through the storm, and just... I think you're really sweet. You know? Really polite and kind. Most twenty-something year olds I meet with bodies like yours are like... douchebags in snapbacks." He bit his lip, and avoided looking at Soobin, fiddling with a loose thread on the cuff of his sleeve. "Pajamas too. You let me borrow these." He raised his arm.</p>
<p>Soobin crossed his arms and watched Kai. "Well," he said. "You're the first, to be honest."</p>
<p>"What?"</p>
<p>"Most people are either afraid of me, or they think I'm frigid." Soobin huffed out a small breath and looked down at the floorboards beneath his feet. "I overhear things. Jisu thinks I'm a 'hard-ass,' and Jaemin thinks I'm pretentious. They'd never say that to my face, of course. They're nice people." He rubbed his face and sighed. "It's just difficult to make friends in a small place like this, when everyone else knows one another already, and you're a stranger."</p>
<p>Kai drew his knees up and folded his arms across them. He leaned his cheek against his arms. "They just don't know how to deal with different people, I guess." He wiggled his toes. "So... you're not from here, either?"</p>
<p>Soobin moved toward his closet. Over his shoulder, he said, "I moved here two years ago. I'm from the east coast, originally." He disappeared through the sliding paper door, and reemerged just a few seconds later with an armful of clothes. "Busan." He pulled his wifebeater off with one hand and dropped it onto the floor at his feet.</p>
<p>"Oh—that's... um." Kai cleared his throat. He looked away, to the window. At anything other than Soobin's very bare torso.</p>
<p>Soobin snorted and pulled on a plain, tight t-shirt. "Sorry, I wasn't thinking." He paused for a moment before saying, "Close your eyes." He changed out of his pajama pants into pair of worn jeans, and pulled on some wool socks as well. Straightened up and planted his hands on his hips. "You can look now."</p>
<p>Kai let his eyes wander over Soobin, a little pink in the face. "I'm not... I'm not embarrassed, you know. I was just. Surprised." He coughed, lightly. "Also, do you... Do you work out?"</p>
<p>"I don't work out." Soobin walked toward the door. "I just spend a lot of my free time carrying a boat to and from the water."</p>
<p>"Wow. Okay. Should I hate you for that?"</p>
<p>"Please don't." Soobin stepped into the hall. "Now, if you want to eat breakfast, I can make you something. But you have to come downstairs within the next ten minutes or I'll leave you all alone in my kitchen."</p>
<p>"Oh—I'm coming, for sure." Kai clambered out of the bed and nearly tripped on his own feet in his hurry to follow Soobin downstairs.</p>
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<p>Kai double-checked to make sure he had everything—he'd eaten breakfast with Soobin, who had then left to go fishing. He'd used Soobin's shower, gotten dressed. Now, he patted himself down and double-checked his messenger bag to ensure he hadn't forgot anything. Everything seemed to be in its proper place though, so he shouldered his bag and slipped out the front door, shutting it quietly behind him. (Soobin had told him not to bother locking it, so he didn't.)</p>
<p>The gravel pathway crunched under his sneakers, and the lavender rustled around his knees.</p>
<p>Eight in the morning, with fresh air and a clear sky, and birds chirping merrily.</p>
<p>He would do anything to get back in bed as soon as physically possible.</p>
<p>He had some trouble getting the door open—the lock stuck for a moment—but after a brief struggle, Kai managed to kick open the door. He almost dropped his bag on the floor but at the last second he remembered it held his computer, so he lowered it gently instead, and kicked his shoes off. Made his way to his bedroom and stripped down to his underwear before crawling into bed.</p>
<p>It was pleasantly warm, and with the curtains drawn only a little bit of sunlight made it into the room—lent it a soft golden glow. Kai lay half underneath the sheets, staring up at the ceiling. In the dim light, he could see faces and shapes in the stucco. He amused himself for a few minutes by making up stories about the people he picked out in the shadows on the ceiling. But the little game grew old fairly quickly, and he sighed to himself as he lay there.</p>
<p>He didn't think he'd be falling asleep any time soon.</p>
<p>All he could think about was Soobin's small smile—the one that seemed to take his face by surprise, when it made his eyes squint—and also his butt, but that was kind of beside the point.</p>
<p>"Huening Kai," he muttered to himself. "You're twenty years old." He scowled at the ceiling. "Talking to yourself in bed at eight in the morning, trying to distract yourself from your stupid massive crush on a man at least five years older than you. Who you barely know." He rolled onto his stomach and hugged his pillow, rubbing his chubby cheek against the coolness of the fabric. "Get it together."</p>
<p>Easier said than done, of course.</p>
<p>His only response to his own question was to bury his face in his pillow with a groan. He wanted to sleep. He wanted someone to kiss him. He wanted <em>Soobin</em> to kiss him, specifically, but that was just ridiculous. He took a deep breath that smelled like fabric softener and dust. If he were honest, he wanted Soobin to do a lot of things with him—to him. Or anyone, really. But Soobin especially.</p>
<p>Wanted to know what his hands felt like. Probably warm, and a little calloused. His lips were probably similarly warm. Maybe soft? Kai wanted to know if that were true—"Are Soobin's lips soft?" He hoped so. Not that he'd get to know unless Soobin kissed him or if he himself got very drunk or very bold. (Flirting was one thing. Actually doing anything was a whole other thing.)</p>
<p>Besides that, Kai wanted... Well. He just <em>wanted</em>. It'd been a while since he got any action, what with deciding to move out to the city, and actually moving, and now living in a new town where he knew no one and drank alone while he wrote. How long had it been...? He counted on his fingers.</p>
<p>Two months since he'd last had <em>anything</em> with anyone, man or woman. Six since he'd had even something small like a <em>kiss</em> with someone he cared about, or even <em>knew</em>.</p>
<p>"Nghhh."</p>
<p>And starting out his morning waking up next to a slab of beef had not helped his situation. Especially when Soobin took his shirt off. Kai passed it off relatively fine (not really) but now, alone in his bed...</p>
<p>The man had a six-pack for Christ's sake. Kai could probably do his laundry on those abs. And the arms... And everything else.</p>
<p>"Jesus Christ." Kai glared into his pillow. "Shut up, brain. I'm trying to sleep."</p>
<p>But he couldn't help thinking about Soobin. And Soobin's body. And his smile. And his abs. Especially his rock-like abs. And... other stuff. Dirty stuff. Involving, preferably, biting. Not hard biting, though—just nips. Maybe hard enough to leave a mark. He'd like that... if Soobin marked him up a little. A bit of manhandling generally suited Kai pretty well.</p>
<p>He squeezed his eyes shut and sighed.</p>
<p>“I’m fucked.”</p>
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<p>"Class is dismissed. Have a good summer, children."</p>
<p>The first graders ran shrieking from the classroom the second Soobin finished his sentence. He shook his head, smiling to himself as he sat down at his desk. School was out, but he still had a little bit of work to do. Namely, cleaning. The only employees, after all, were Jaemin, Jisu and himself, and a part-time principal of sorts who doubled as a counselor. Which left the cleaning to the teachers. Luckily, the kids hadn't left much more than a bit of loose paper and crumbs.</p>
<p>Soobin cleared his desk and packed away all of his belongings into his bag. He wiped off the chalkboard and vacuumed the floor. Peeled the stickers off of each little desk and set to scrubbing them down with a bucket of water and a bottle of dish soap he kept on the highest shelf in the closet. Made sure all trash was in the garbage can, and took that outside to the dumpster. Any little lost items he locked in the closet, for students to find next year—or, if he got a call from a parent, for him to retrieve for them.</p>
<p>He cleaned the windows too, and one of the two bathrooms in the schoolhouse.</p>
<p>Jaemin had left already, and Jisu was just locking her room up as he headed for his classroom—they always cleaned faster than him. Maybe he was just slow.</p>
<p>"Have a nice summer, Jisu." Soobin nodded at her, as he backed into his room.</p>
<p>She paused at the front doors. Gave him a rather tight smile and said, "You too, Mr. Choi." She turned around and nearly ran straight into Kai—five inches shorter than him in her heels. She excused herself and inched around him, leaving the building.</p>
<p>Soobin frowned. "Kai? What are you doing here?" He stepped into his classroom, indicating that Kai should follow him.</p>
<p>"Oh, I was uh—I just happened to be in the area." Kai scurried after him, careful not to drop the brown paper bag in his arms. "Just. Walking by. Saw the kids leaving and chanting 'summertime' over and over, so I thought... You know, I thought I'd drop in. Say hi."</p>
<p>"Uh-huh." Soobin raised his eyebrows. He went to the windows and locked each securely. He bent down to grab his bucket, with the sponge and the dish soap. "So you just... happened to be walking by Seokho's, all the way across town, and then you just happened to walk by the school?" He spoke over his shoulder as he scrubbed the windows.</p>
<p>Kai's face scrunched up. "Well, when you put it like that it just sounds silly."</p>
<p>Soobin Chuckled. "It does."</p>
<p>"Okay," Kai shrugged and sat on the edge of a desk. He looked down at the bag in his hands. "So maybe I bought donuts from—Seokho's? Yeah. That place. Maybe I was curious, and then I thought to myself... 'You know, I have a lot of donuts. I should see if Soobin wants some.'" He scratched his nose. "Do you... want one?"</p>
<p>Soobin shook his head. "I'm sorry, but I can't." He dropped the sponge into the bucket and turned around, crossing his arms. "I'm sucrose intolerant. I can't really eat a lot of sugary foods."</p>
<p>Kai looked like he might drop unconscious on the spot at the very <em>idea</em> of not being able to eat sugary foods. His forehead crinkled, and he asked, "Not even donuts?"</p>
<p>"Not even donuts."</p>
<p>"Oh." Kai scratched the back of his neck. A light pink tint spread across his face as he looked down at his feet, and he cleared his throat, embarrassed. He fiddled with the edge of the paper bag. His disappointment showed clearly through his slouching posture, and he kept his eyes downturned. "Sorry. I uh—I should have asked... Sorry."</p>
<p>Soobin frowned. "Hey," He walked over, drying his hands on a paint-stained towel, and stopped directly in front of Kai. "You didn't know." He reached a hand out—briefly stilled as if unsure what to do. He settled on putting his hand on Kai's shoulder. "If you really want to share, I'll eat one. I won't <em>die</em> if I eat a single donut." He leaned down, to catch Kai's eye. When Kai finally met his eyes, he smiled and said, "I promise."</p>
<p>"Are you sure?"</p>
<p>"Am I sure I won't die?" Soobin smirked.</p>
<p>Kai rolled his eyes. "No, you jerk." He huffed, and glanced down at his paper bag. "I mean... I don't wanna make you eat something that'll make you sick."</p>
<p>"Well," Soobin tugged Kai to his feet. He let his hand linger maybe a second too long on Kai's arm, and stood a little too close, but neither of them cared to move. "How's this: I'll eat half of one if you agree to go on a picnic with me."</p>
<p>Kai pretended to think for about half a second before grinning and saying, "I'll definitely go on a picnic with you. You don't even need to eat a donut."</p>
<p>"Good." Soobin stepped back. "Did you take your bike, or did you walk?"</p>
<p>"I took the bus."</p>
<p>Soobin nodded, and grabbed his bag from beside the desk. "You can ride on the back of my bicycle, then." He beckoned toward the door, and locked the door to his room behind them. He locked the front doors to the school as well, when they stepped out into the sunlight, and led Kai to where he had parked his bike.</p>
<p>Kai settled backwards on the bicycle's rear rack, and held his paper bag of donuts in his lap as Soobin took off. He wobbled a little, but he'd grown up riding on the back of his dad's bike so it was just a matter of remembering how to stay balanced. He even leaned back a little against Soobin. Soobin didn't seem to notice.</p>
<p>As they rode down the road, the breeze cooled the sweat on Kai's skin, from the hot sun, and he said, "I feel like I'm in high school again, if high school was a movie from the Eighties!" He laughed and clutched his bag tighter.</p>
<p>Soobin snorted. "You're certainly has the face to star in a high school life movie from the 1980's."</p>
<p>"Excuse me?"</p>
<p>“Your face has that old-film quality you know?”</p>
<p>“What’s that supposed to mean!”</p>
<p>A quiet laugh, and Soobin turned a corner sharp enough to nearly send Kai flying—Kai grabbed at the freight rack with one hand and practically crushed his donuts. He huffed and elbowed Soobin (gently.)</p>
<p>Soobin slowed a little bit.</p>
<p>He turned onto a different street. Trees lined the sidewalk and spread their branches, wide and arching, so that sunlight filtered in patches through their green leaves. Kai closed his eyes and leaned more heavily against Soobin. He focused on the whir of the bike's wheels, and the peeping of sparrows, and the way the dappled sunlight passed over his eyelids and lit them up before falling into shadow again.</p>
<p>The sound of the ocean began to fill the air, and the fresh salt smell, too. Seagulls called from the sky.</p>
<p>Eventually, the bicycle rolled to a stop, and Soobin dismounted. Kai hopped off, blinking at the bright reflection of the sun on the waves. He followed Soobin to his house.</p>
<p>"Do you have any requests?" Soobin pulled a few things out of his fridge before looking in the cabinets under the kitchen island and pulling out a wicker basket with a padded lid. "I bought groceries yesterday, so I have a lot to choose from." He smiled at Kai.</p>
<p>Kai shrugged and set his bag on the counter. "I'm fine with whatever." He scuffed his bare foot on the floor—both of their shoes were at the front door so they wouldn't track sand all over the living room. "As long as it's not tea."</p>
<p>"You don't like tea?"</p>
<p>"Not really." Kai leaned his elbows on the granite countertop. "It doesn't appeal to me much."</p>
<p>Soobin shook his head and set about making a couple of sandwiches. "Well, that means I don't have to waste my tea on you." He grinned, briefly, like a flash of sun from behind a cloud. "Although... I'll make you some chai, sometime. I can't drink it, but I like the smell, and even if you don't like regular tea you should like chai tea." He breathed out a soft laugh. "Even my little sister, who hates tea, loves chai.</p>
<p>"I'd like that."</p>
<p>Another smile.</p>
<p>Kai liked it when Soobin smiled like that. The weird half smile—the "Archaic" smile—was nice, but this smile... This smile was Kai's favorite because it was warm and quick and happy and gentle. He wanted to make Soobin smile like that all the time.</p>
<p>"What are you looking at?"</p>
<p>"What?" Kai blinked. "Oh—I'm... just. You're cute when you smile."</p>
<p>Soobin stilled. He seemed taken aback, and stared at Kai. Finally, he looked away—out the window. "I—" He covered his mouth with one hand. "Thank you."</p>
<p>"Did I—are you blushing?!" Kai laughed and bounced a little on his heels. When Soobin shook his head, Kai grinned wider and said, "You are! You're so adorable!"</p>
<p>Soobin glowered at him. "I'm not—"</p>
<p>Kai laughed again.</p>
<p>"I'm not!" Soobin returned his attention to making their sandwiches. "I'm not blushing, and I am most certainly not <em>cute</em>." He glared daggers at the sourdough bread, pink in the face.</p>
<p>With an amused scoff, Kai slumped against the counter. Didn't say anything. Instead, he watched the color fade from Soobin's cheeks as he prepared their food. Watched the way his forehead wrinkled just a bit between his eyebrows, and the way his mouth tightened just a little, as he concentrated. The way he handled the knife like something delicate, though it was only a stainless steel butter knife. The way the muscles in his arm moved when he grabbed a sharper, heavier knife and cut through each sandwich diagonally.</p>
<p>Soobin noticed him staring, but he kept quiet and shook his head.</p>
<p>They set out with the wicker basket full of food—salmon sandwiches made from leftover fish, salted tomatoes and cucumbers, some sliced watermelon, and more of the leftover salmon, all on ice.</p>
<p>Kai almost forgot his donuts, but at the last minute he grabbed the bag, and ran after Soobin outside. He nearly tripped trying to walk and put his sandals back on at the same time. Managed to keep upright, though. He followed Soobin down the beach. Soobin stopped, basket on his arm, and waited for Kai to catch up with that half-smile on his face. He held his hand out.</p>
<p>"Shake?" Kai frowned.</p>
<p>Soobin rolled his eyes. "<em>Take</em>. "He grabbed Kai's hand and tugged him along. Kai stumbled, and he tightened his grip on Soobin's hand, letting their fingers lace together as he walked along the sand like an ungainly duck. Squawked like one, too.</p>
<p>The sand began to be interspersed with thin grass, and lavender, and blanketflower. Soobin led him into a little bower of a clearing, shaded by scraggly trees, soft and warm, and carpeted with a little layer of grass and dirt and sand. He set the basket down, and pulled out a quilt. Set it out on the ground, gesturing for Kai to sit down.</p>
<p>So Kai sat.</p>
<p>And Soobin handed him some food.</p>
<p>They ate in silence, for the most part. At least until the sandwiches had gone. Eating cucumber slices with his fingers, though, Kai spoke. "You know," He licked some salt from his thumb. "You really are cute. I wasn't just saying that to embarrass you or anything."</p>
<p>"Yeah?" Soobin picked at a piece of fish. "I never thought you were anything but sincere, when you said it."</p>
<p>"Good."</p>
<p>"I still disagree with you, however."</p>
<p>Kai sighed, and gave Soobin a faux-glare. "You're wrong, then." He squinted at Soobin.</p>
<p>"Or maybe you're just blind."</p>
<p>"What!" Kai set his little salad (of sorts) on the blanket in front of him. "I'll just put on my glasses and prove you wrong!" He dug around in his pocket for his glasses—popped their case open and shoved them onto his face, and leveled an intense stare on Soobin. He didn't say anything for a while. Just looked and looked.</p>
<p>Finally, he muttered, "Your eyes are black."</p>
<p>Soobin laughed.</p>
<p>"And I stand by what I said—" Kai inched a little closer, and Soobin sobered. "I think you're very cute. Um—I really do. Everything I say... It's true. You are cute and sweet and..." He paused, glancing down at the pattern of the quilt. "Sorry, I'm not very good at this."</p>
<p>The flowers and the leaves rustled in the breeze off the sea, and a seagull cried above. Soobin didn't smile, but his expression was gentle, and he reached out to put his hand over Kai's. "Are you trying to ask me out, Huening-ssi?"</p>
<p>That playful tone and the warmth of his palm against Kai's knuckles made Kai's pulse stutter a little—or at least that's what it felt like to him. "Maybe." He looked down at their hands. "I—I'm not doing very well, though, am I?"</p>
<p>Soobin leaned close and planted his lips on Kai's forehead. He only pulled back a little bit, to say, "I think you got your point across."</p>
<p>Kai adjusted his glasses, clearing his throat. He moved his hand, and wound his fingers together with Soobin's, and gave him a crooked grin. "That's um—that's good. Good." He looked down at their joined hands and laughed. "I'm glad."</p>
<p>"Me too." Soobin moved even closer. "You should finish eating." He let go of Kai's hand, but wrapped his arm around his back instead and leaned a little bit against him. Nothing else. No more little kisses, or anything like that... But that was fine. Kai relaxed against him as he ate, and didn't mind the extra body heat. He liked it. He liked... the situation. He liked feeling all warm and stabilized and cared for.</p>
<p>They ended up splitting a donut after all—Kai didn't want Soobin to eat it, if it would make him feel bad, but Soobin insisted. "I'm feeling good today," he said. "A tiny bit should be fine."</p>
<p>"Are you sure?"</p>
<p>"I'm sure." Soobin ate a few bites, despite Kai's worrying, and when he remained intact he smiled. "I'm fine." He let Kai eat the rest, though. Drank from a mason jar of water he'd brought along with the food, and propped his chin on Kai's shoulder.</p>
<p>“Hey?”</p>
<p>“Yeah?”</p>
<p>“Can I call you Hueningie?”</p>
<p>Kai blinked, then smiled shyly into his donut.</p>
<p>“Yeah. I’d like that.”</p>
<p>When Kai decided he'd had enough, they packed everything away into the basket and left the clearing. The sun hung low and large in the sky (though sunset remained a few hours away, at least.) Soobin carried the basket, and Kai trailed behind him, clumsy in the sand. Soobin slowed for him and held his hand out, and Kai took it, and they walked back to Soobin's house with their fingers entwined.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. Chapter 2</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Lying in bed the next morning, Kai called his dad. Just because. He opened with, "You're gonna make fun of me."</p>
<p>Immediately: "You asked out that boy, didn't you?"</p>
<p>Kai rolled his eyes and sat up. "First of all, he's not a boy. Second of all, I didn't actually ask him out, really." He kicked his blankets off, wiggling his toes, and picked at the hem of his boxers.</p>
<p>"But you're an item now?"</p>
<p>"You make it sound like... like we're both weird symbiotic little things that combined into one object."</p>
<p>His dad laughed. He asked, "But you <em>are</em> together?"</p>
<p>"Um..." Kai shrugged, then remembered that his dad couldn't see him. He chewed on his lip. "We held hands." He grinned. Picked at a loose thread on his blanket. "He kissed me on the cheek, and that's about it—Uh... I think..." He paused and tried to gather his words together. "It's nice." He left it at that. Simple and to the point. "It's nice to move so slowly."</p>
<p>"You met him less than a week ago."</p>
<p>Kai scowled. "Shush! I mean—Like if you go in terms of counting dates, or something like that—like, say... Say the picnic we had was a first date, kind of. Although—he did kiss my hand when he came over for dinner on Friday but that's beside the point. The point is, if you count this picnic as a first date, and it was made up entirely of hand-holding and one single kiss on my face, then that's kind of a nice pace. I think so, at least." He lay back down and splayed his limbs out. "It's been a long time since I've been in any kind of relationship like that."</p>
<p>"I see. Well, as long as you're happy, I'm happy." Kai's dad seemed to think for a moment. "How's the unpacking going?"</p>
<p>Groaning, Kai rolled onto his stomach. "Awful." He rubbed at his eyes. "I've still got something like half of the kitchen and living room in boxes."</p>
<p>"Looks like your relationship isn't the only thing you're taking slow."</p>
<p>"Dad, shut up!"</p>
<p>Loud laughter, and then, "Are you sure you don't want me to come down there? Help you empty those boxes?"</p>
<p>Kai sighed. "I'm sure. I'm a big boy. I can handle it. I'll try to finish... soon."</p>
<p>"Maybe your boyfriend can help you."</p>
<p>"He's not my boyfriend! He's just my... my friend... who's also male."</p>
<p>"Right. You're male friend who you also just happen to go on picnic dates with, and hold hands with on the beach, who kisses you." His dad snorted. "Anyway, go. Eat breakfast—and don't tell me you have, because I can tell you just woke up by the sound of your voice—and go unpack your kitchen."</p>
<p>Kai rolled his eyes and hauled himself upright again. "You're such a <em>dad</em>. I'll talk to you later."</p>
<p>"Damn straight. Later, Ningning. Love ya, bud."</p>
<p>"'M not your bud, but I love you too, Dad."</p>
<p>Kai stared at the wall. He really didn't want to unpack anymore boxes... but they took up so much space, and he probably needed the stuff in them... Maybe he'd eat some cereal and call Soobin—wait, no, he didn't have Soobin's number... He'd eat some cereal, then walk to Soobin's house and see if he wouldn't mind helping out a little. Offer dinner or... cuddles... in exchange.</p>
<p>He hauled himself out of bed and set out to do his tasks.</p>
<p>The walk to Soobin's house was pleasant, and the breeze off the ocean restless and cool. Kai made his unsteady way across the sand. When he knocked, no one answered. And no one continued to answer. And so on for at least five minutes. He stood awkwardly on the doorstep and coughed to himself. Should have realized that just showing up at someone's house might not be the best idea. Just as he turned to leave, though, he heard a whistle, and whirled around.</p>
<p>Soobin stood in the waves, pulling a white and red fourteen foot sailboat out of the waves. He waved his arm over his head.</p>
<p>Kai waved back.</p>
<p>Eventually Soobin hauled his boat up the beach and onto a trailer, and suddenly Kai understood exactly why he had abs despite the lack of gym training like a town boy like him had. Although...</p>
<p>"Isn't that bad for the boat?" Kai knew nothing about boats, but he felt fairly certain you weren't meant to drag them across sand and gravel for several hundred feet and then shove them onto a trailer—there had to be actual procedures for boat storage.</p>
<p>Soobin shrugged. "A little, but I keep her happy."</p>
<p>"Uh-huh." Kai raised his eyebrows.</p>
<p>"Anyway," Soobin crossed his arms, tilting his head curiously. "Did you need me?"</p>
<p>Kai scratched the back of his neck, feeling a little awkward, suddenly. "I uh... Just wondered if you wouldn't mind helping me unpack? I mean—It was my dad's idea, and you don't have to—I just. I'll... make you dinner?" He scuffed his foot against the sand, focusing his attention on anything but Soobin—he ended up staring at a broken shell in the sand.</p>
<p>"Sure," Soobin's hand drifted briefly over Kai's arm, and he squeezed his elbow before pulling back. "Let me just put away everything—you can wait in the living room, if you'd like." His eyes, all silver-blue in the sun, crinkled at the edges though he didn't smile with his mouth. Not noticeably. But his expression was soft and his touch was gentle when he reached out again and pushed a stray curl of hair from Kai's face. "Don't fall asleep again though."</p>
<p>Kai rolled his eyes and blushed and grinned. Caught Soobin's hand in his own. "I won't." He held on to Soobin's fingers for just a moment, and let him go. "Promise."</p>
<p>Soobin shook his head, and then his mouth <em>did</em> turn up at the edges—but the true smile remained primarily in his eyes, like always.</p>
<p>The front door creaked a little bit when Kai opened it. He slipped out of his shoes, remembering the rule about tracking sand everywhere, and padded toward the couch on bare feet. The floorboards felt much colder than the sand outside, though not unpleasant. He settled on the sofa and stared at the dead fireplace with his hands folded in his lap. Glanced around the living room. Sure he'd been in it before, but it looked different in the bright sunlight of mid-morning, compared to a mid-afternoon storm's light. Looked warmer. Just about as rustic. He liked the rows and rows of books on shelves, and the slight worn feeling—like the house was an old antique that looked a little beat up but not in a crappy way—in an elegant, handmade way.</p>
<p>Lost in his thoughts, Kai almost didn't hear Soobin come into the house. But the door squeaked, and the floorboards made tiny little protests, and alerted Kai to the other man's presence. He looked up and beamed at Soobin, who smiled in that sort of startled, bashful way, with a tiny sigh almost like a laugh but not quite.</p>
<p>His arms were full, with a smallish cooler and some random articles of clothing. He carried them into the kitchen and left them on the island, turning back into the room, straightening his Henley. He stopped behind the couch and leaned over it, hands planted firmly on the back.</p>
<p>Kai tilted his head back to look up at him.</p>
<p>Soobin kissed his forehead upside-down—a reserved brush of lips on skin—and murmured, "I need to shower and change into something clean." He moved to pull away, but Kai reached up and grabbed his face between his hands.</p>
<p>"No," Kai turned and stood on his knees on the couch. He let his hands drop and kept a small amount of distance between their faces. He wasn't sure what would be considered appropriate versus unwelcome, so he played it safe. "You're just gonna get all sweaty and gross again, if you help me unpack. Just—just grab a change of clothes and bring it with you?" He laid his hand over Soobin's, on the back of the couch.</p>
<p>Soobin turned his own hand palm up and clasped Kai's wrist. "Okay." He gave Kai's arm a squeeze, and backed away. "I'll go get clothes, and then we head to your house."</p>
<p>"Okay."</p>
<p>Soobin smiled again. A sudden burst of light between leaves. He patted Kai's shoulder and went upstairs.</p>
<p>Kai definitely did not stare at his ass while he walked up the steps.</p>
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<p>"Wow."</p>
<p>Kai grimaced. "I know, it's awful... I'm just—I hate unpacking, you know?"</p>
<p>"It took me two weeks to unpack all of my books." Soobin shed his thin jacket and adjusted his suspenders (they were striped navy and white). He looked around the room. "I think we can manage this in a day. You've done all the hard work already, anyway." He walked past Kai, briefly reaching out and patting his shoulder. To others, it might have seemed like a fairly distant gesture, but Kai smiled at the soft familiarity of a simple touch.</p>
<p>He lingered in the doorway between the living room and the kitchen and watched Soobin move around the room as if he wanted to map it out in his head. Soobin glanced at him, and cracked a little smile. "Are you just going to stand there? Or will you show me what you want me to do?" He raised his eyebrows, slipping his hands into his pockets. He looked like he could be on the cover of GQ, if he slapped on a blazer and slicked his hair back.</p>
<p>Kai blinked. "Oh—" He scratched at his jaw. "Um... That white one needs to go in the kitchen, but I can't move it." He cleared his throat. "It's heavy."</p>
<p>"I see." Soobin seemed amused, though it was, as always, a little hard to tell.</p>
<p>"My dad carried it in for me and left it there."</p>
<p>Soobin snorted. "Your dad, who's what... thirty?"</p>
<p>Kai made an offended noise and crossed his arms. "How old do you think I am?! My dad's is fifty-eight! I’m a big boy!" He leaned on the doorframe more fully. Looked thoughtful, and bit his lip. Despite wanting to ask a question, he kept silent.</p>
<p>Until Soobin planted his hands on his hips and said, "You can ask how old I am." He held one hand up. "Actually, don't bother. I'm twenty-four." He turned away, to the white box, and wrapped his arms around it. He lifted it in one heave, with a soft grunt, and mumbled, "How about you?" His forehead wrinkled and his arms strained as he made his way, slowly, toward Kai.</p>
<p>"Um..." Kai maybe stared a bit. "What?"</p>
<p>Soobin rolled his eyes. He edged past Kai, into the kitchen, and let the box thud onto the nearest flat surface—the dining table. The table creaked threateningly, but stayed standing. Soobin took a moment to catch his breath. "What is in this box?"</p>
<p>"Uh... cast iron pans, and... and stuff."</p>
<p>Soobin nodded. "Okay. And, I asked your age. But you seemed... distracted."</p>
<p>Kai blushed, looking down at his feet. "I'm... old enough."</p>
<p>Silence, and an amused stare, with one eyebrow raised.</p>
<p>"I—I'm twenty."</p>
<p>Soobin smiled. He tapped his finger against Kai's waist, and leaned close. "Yeah. That's old enough." He tugged on Kai's belt loop before stepping away into the living room.</p>
<p>Kai watched him, pink-faced, as he dragged a bookshelf against the wall. Hunched his shoulders and wished he could erase his blush. But it persisted. Probably because Soobin's sleeves were rolled up to the elbow and he had really nice arms, and he just looked really, really good. All navy and white and sky blue making his eyes pop out as a bright silver. (Kai noticed his suspenders actually matched his sneakers.)</p>
<p>"Hueningie?"</p>
<p>Kai jumped. "Um, yes?"</p>
<p>"Should I shelve these?" He gestured to the open box of books at his feet.</p>
<p>"Oh—yeah, sure. Just alphabetize them by author and title." Kai backed into the kitchen, awkwardly. "I'll just unpack the pots and pans and... yeah."</p>
<p>"Alright." Soobin turned away.</p>
<p>Kai found his old, beat-up transistor radio on top of the fridge and plugged it in, turning it to an oldies station. They listened to Shawn Mendes and Troye Sivan, even Ariana Grande, while they emptied boxes. Occasionally Kai embarrassed himself by saying something silly and flirtatious that mostly made him sound like a dumbass. But Soobin seemed to enjoy his poor attempts at pick-up lines.</p>
<p>Upstairs wasn't much more organized. Soobin put the bedframe together almost completely on his own, while Kai pretended to be helpful but mostly just watched. Though he did microwave some leftover pasta for them to eat. He washed the dishes, after that, and when he came back upstairs Soobin had already gotten much more done. Only a few boxes remained—Soobin was reaching for a large green shoebox.</p>
<p>Kai blanched. He'd been looking for that box but he absolutely did not want Soobin to open it.</p>
<p>"I—uh, I can take that! Don't bother yourself, you can just take a break now or something!" He snatched the box from Soobin's hands.</p>
<p>"We just took a break..."</p>
<p>Kai nodded. "Right." He shoved the shoebox under his pillow. It wasn't well-hidden—not really hidden at all, in fact—but that didn't matter. "Well, um... In that case you can..." He cast around for something that needed doing. Caught on a plastic tub. "You can see what's in that tub." He pointed.</p>
<p>"...Okay." Soobin shot him a bemused glance but moved toward the maroon Rubbermaid tub and pried it open. He sat on the floor beside it and pulled out some curtains, and various fabrics. Old clothes. A pillowcase with a hole in it. A bottle of alcohols. "Why is there soju in your curtains?"</p>
<p>Kai frowned. "You know, I'm not sure." He took the bottle from Soobin and held it up to the sunlight streaming through the window. Gave a shrug and set it on top of the dresser before bending down to help Soobin untangle the curtains.</p>
<p>They finished unpacking everything by dinnertime.</p>
<p>Soobin used his shower, and changed into a pair of dark jeans and a soft-looking blue and green plaid shirt, with the sleeves rolled up to the elbows just as with his Henley. He sat on Kai's couch—now centered nicely in the living room, facing the small television. He draped his arms over the back of the couch and closed his eyes, letting out a content sigh. His damp hair stuck to his forehead in places.</p>
<p>With a quiet huff, Kai sat beside him. "What do you want to eat for dinner?" He looked at Soobin curiously.</p>
<p>A shrug, and Soobin murmured, "I'm willing to eat almost anything, right now." His mouth twisted. As if to emphasize his hunger, Soobin's stomach chose that moment to gurgle. Kai laughed, and he grimaced.</p>
<p>"I'll make something with a lot of calories." Kai grinned and pushed himself back to his feet.</p>
<p>Soobin smiled.</p>
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<p>Kai glared at the open shoebox sitting innocently on his sheets. Mocking him. Thank God Soobin hadn't opened it. Kai had no desire to see Soobin's reaction to Kai's—admittedly rather vanilla—assortment of porn and sex-related stuff. That would just be beyond embarrassing. It would be mortifying. He was glad he'd returned upstairs when he did, avoiding eternal shame and humiliation.</p>
<p>He shut the box and dropped it to the floor rather carelessly, shoving it underneath his bedframe with one foot.</p>
<p>In the darkness of his bedroom, he lay down.</p>
<p>It felt strange to sleep so high off the ground—Kai had gotten accustomed to sleeping on a mattress on the floor. But after a little while of aimless fantasies and half-coherent ideas for future books, he fell asleep.</p>
<p>He dreamed about a giant snake named Cherry, and spent the night thoroughly disturbed.</p>
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<p>Tuesday morning brought with it fitful showers, humid warmth, and bars of light slipping between the clouds to saturate everything with vibrant color in patches and leave the rest in purple shade.</p>
<p>Kai felt sad and worn out, and he wasn't sure why.</p>
<p>Perhaps it was loneliness. He had spent little of the weekend with Soobin—who'd been surprisingly busy, fishing and cooking and sewing—and knew no one else in town other than those he'd briefly met in shopping lines or on the sidewalk. So, it could have been loneliness. He wanted to talk to someone. Knew if he called his dad, he'd only worry and again insist on driving down immediately no matter what prior appointments he had booked.</p>
<p>So that was out of the question.</p>
<p>Kai opened his bedroom window and leaned out to look at the damp trees, sighing. Little sprinkles of rain brushed against his face and glasses. He wiped the lenses and ducked back inside, plopping down on his bed and leafing through his notes. He could try and write more of his book, he supposed... Or he could call Soobin—finally had his number—and see if, maybe, he wanted to do something.</p>
<p>He opted for the latter.</p>
<p>His cellphone beeped at him, when he flipped it open, so he plugged it in before typing in Soobin's number and laying back on his bed.</p>
<p>It rang, and eventually went to voicemail. Unfortunate.</p>
<p>"Choi Soobin, please leave a message."</p>
<p>How fitting.</p>
<p>Kai sighed yet again—it was a sighing kind of day—and dropped his phone onto the sheets, pulling his glasses off and rubbing his face. He needed to shave. It’s just little stub but he just hated the feel of something on his face. After all, a neat appearance led to neater emotions. Or something like that. He pushed himself off of his bed and wandered to the bathroom. Found his little electric hair trimmer that he used weekly and set about the honestly rather irritating task of shaving.</p>
<p>As he was just finishing up, the phone rang. He nearly tripped over his own feet trying to get out of the bathroom quickly, and threw himself onto the bed, flipping his phone open. "Hello?" He took a moment to catch his breath.</p>
<p>"Did you call me? I was in the garden."</p>
<p>Kai grinned. "Soobin! I did—I uh—well, I just wanted to know if you wanted to maybe hang out or something?" He mentally cursed his poor wording and hoped he didn't seem like too much of a dope. "Um—I mean... I want company?"</p>
<p>Soobin laughed, softly—almost inaudibly—so Kai figured he was fine.</p>
<p>"I'm free all day."</p>
<p>Fantastic. Kai sat up, hugging his pillow to himself. "Really? Cool—" He paused. "Um... You don't have to, though, I mean... I know I'm kind of hyper sometimes and I'm kind of lame—"</p>
<p>"Why are you putting yourself down?" Soobin sounded like he was frowning. "You are completely fine, Hueningie. And I want to spend time with you. I promise."</p>
<p>"Ah..." Kai rested his chin on his pillow. "Um." He fiddled with a loose seam on his jeans.</p>
<p>Soobin let out a soft breath, but not in a bad way. In an amused way, or at least Kai hoped so. He asked Kai, gently, "Are you lonely?"</p>
<p>Kai nodded before remembering that, of course, Soobin couldn't see him. "A little, I guess." He cleared his throat. "I mean, I guess I'm just now realizing that I really don't know anyone here, and I'm just... sitting alone in my house writing a children's book. Like—I just need some air or something. But it's raining. So I can't write outside because—Well, what if water got in my computer or something?!" He realized he was rambling, and fell silent. "Sorry," he whispered.</p>
<p>"Would you like to come over? You can stay all day. I plan to make dinner over the fire pit tonight, as well. I think you might enjoy that."</p>
<p>"What are you making?"</p>
<p>"Baked potatoes. And fish."</p>
<p>Kai smiled. "Always fish." He scratched his jaw. "Do you want me to bring anything?"</p>
<p>"Bring yourself. And perhaps your pajamas, if you'd like to take a nap, or just want to be more comfortable."</p>
<p>Very tempting... "Alright. Are you sure I don't need to bring anything?"</p>
<p>"I'm <em>positive</em>. I'll see you soon."</p>
<p>"Okay, bye." Kai set his phone aside. He set about changing into his pajamas. He'd slept poorly for most of the weekend, and the thought of just sitting down in soft clothes in front of Soobin's fireplace (whether lit or not) appealed to him enormously. He slipped on his shoes, snatched his keys, and left the duplex.</p>
<p>The rain spattered against his glasses, tiny drops making it hard to see.</p>
<p>He glanced up at the mottled clouds and set off down the road.</p>
<p>When he got to the beach, he saw Soobin standing a little ways away from his house, in his canvas jacket that flapped in the breeze as he crouched down and ran his fingers through the sand. Kai called his name, and he looked up. Waved, and stood. He trotted toward Kai, and before Kai could say a word, Soobin grabbed his hand and folded something cold and smooth and slightly sandy into his hand. A seashell, with a little crack in it. Kai raised his eyebrows.</p>
<p>"For me?"</p>
<p>"For you." Soobin returned his expression, and wrapped an arm around his shoulders, leading him toward the house. He stepped inside and leaned close to Kai's ear and whispered, "When you're lonely and I'm not near, you can put it to your ear and hear the ocean, and think of me." He shed his coat and hung it by the door. With a fleeting smile, he disappeared into the kitchen.</p>
<p>Kai stood in the middle of the living room with a bright blush staining his face.</p>
<p>He pocketed the shell.</p>
<p>Soobin reemerged with a mug in his hand, and ushered Kai to the couch. "Sit down, please." His voice was soft and gentle, and Kai liked that. He did as asked and settled on the couch. Soobin set the mug on one of the little side tables, to Kai's left, and murmured, "You remember I mentioned chai the other day? I think you'll like it." He lowered himself on the cushion to Kai's right, and slipped an arm around his waist. Looked so much like a concerned cat that Kai had to smile a little bit, and couldn't possibly turn down the tea. He wrapped his fingers around the porcelain—all warm and smooth—and breathed in the steam.</p>
<p>It <em>did</em> smell good. Like... really, really good.</p>
<p>"I don't drink chai tea, really, because of its sweetness, but when you were over the first time..." Soobin paused, gathering his words about himself. "Well, you obviously find normal tea distasteful, so I thought you might appreciate this."</p>
<p>Kai sipped at it, and sighed. "It's really strong." He let his eyes drift shut, and leaned against Soobin's solid heat. "I like it. It tastes like comfort." What a silly thing to say.</p>
<p>Soobin chuckled. "It does, doesn't it?" He gave Kai's hip a gentle squeeze—as if to reinforce his presence, although he didn't really need to. Kai was all too aware of Soobin's existence. Of every spot their skin brushed, and the sturdiness of his torso and the solid strength in his arms.</p>
<p>He shook the thoughts from his head.</p>
<p>"If I fall asleep you better wake me up."</p>
<p>"Why?"</p>
<p>Kai's mouth twisted. "Bad dreams."</p>
<p>Frowning, Soobin shifted. Supported Kai more firmly. "If you have a nightmare, I'll wake you up."</p>
<p>That made Kai's face smooth, for a moment at least. He rolled his eyes and sort of smiled and whispered, "You're a dork." He chewed on his lip. "But I like you anyway." He let his free hand move to his waist, where Soobin's hand curled, and slid their fingers together. Leaned his head in the crook of Soobin's neck. Soobin tightened his arm around Kai. He even turned his head to press a little tiny kiss to Kai's temple and cheek.</p>
<p>Kai let his mind wander a bit. Let his surroundings fade somewhat, except for the spots where Soobin's skin brushed his. Everything clouded over with a warm, dreamy fog—until he jerked, involuntarily, dragging himself back into full consciousness. He blinked, tired, and sighed. Realized he still held the mug in one hand, and set it on the side table. If he did fall asleep like that, he didn't particularly want to spill hot tea on his lap. Though he imagined Soobin would probably prevent that from happening... But still. Best to take precautions. He rubbed at his eyes, took off his glasses and set those beside the mug. Turned more into Soobin's embrace and snuggled into him with a sleepy noise. He could feel the rumble of Soobin's quiet laugh in his chest. That, he thought, was nice. Very nice. Fantastic, even—he couldn't tell you what made it so fantastic. Just that it <em>was</em>.</p>
<p>"I think you need a bed." Soobin moved to stand, but Kai grabbed a handful of his shirt. Soobin sighed. "I'm not going to leave you." He pulled Kai even further into his arms, and actually lifted him up despite his tremendous weight. Kai would have blushed but he felt too tired and warm to be embarrassed.</p>
<p>Soobin only let him down to coax him up the staircase. Probably a good thing too. The idea of being carried up a spiral staircase... No. Just no.</p>
<p>At some point, Kai found himself cradled in Soobin's arms again, and surrounded by mid-morning light. Soobin's bed. Soft sheets and the slight smell of citrus from, Kai assumed, Soobin's soap or aftershave or something. He couldn't think hard enough to really figure out what it might be other than it made him think of orange juice mixed with gin and cloves.</p>
<p>He liked it.</p>
<p>He reached out and pulled at Soobin's hand, when the other man made as if to move away. Soobin allowed himself to be pulled down onto the bed beside Kai and murmured, "What did I say? I'm not going to leave you." He lay down and wrapped his arms around Kai. "Though I did plan to change into some pajamas, or at least something moderately more comfortable than what I'm wearing."</p>
<p>Kai grumbled. Soobin huffed. "Fine, fine." He tangled their legs together and let his arms completely encircle Kai's waist. Kissed Kai's forehead. Kai pressed his face against Soobin's neck—the source of that orange smell, it seemed. How he hadn't noticed before... Well, maybe the chai had been distracting his nose. He took a deep breath. Bitter orange-y aftershave, yes, but also the slight tang of salt and fish that often lingered on Soobin's skin. Increasingly familiar, the more time Kai spent with him. But still, that citrus smell...</p>
<p>"Did you buy a new aftershave, or something?" Kai wrinkled his nose.</p>
<p>Soobin said, "I've actually had it for a while. But I only began using it within the past few days."</p>
<p>Kai nodded. Nuzzled Soobin. "I thought you smelled different. Less lemon-y." He hummed, warm and content. He could feel himself drifting again, and didn't mind much.</p>
<p>"Yes. I use a lemon-scented soap."</p>
<p>"Ahh..." Kai sighed to himself.</p>
<p>And he fell asleep.</p>
<p>Soobin stayed wrapped around him until he could be 100% certain Kai was asleep. Only then did he disentangle himself as carefully as possible. He remained in his bedroom, though. Changed into pajamas despite it not even being noon yet, and grabbed a book as he stepped onto the bed and climbed over the wrought iron frame at the head of the bed to sit in the window seat. He cracked the window a little. Slightly damp, salty air breathed in through the little crack and rustled the pages of <em>Haneul and the Sea of Stories</em>.</p>
<p>He leaned against the window and read, while Kai slept.</p>
<p> </p>
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<p>Soobin left a little note beneath Kai's hand on the pillow, and went outside as the sun peaked high in the sky. The clouds had dispersed, and the water glittered blindingly, while a slight breeze ruffled its surface and sent the lavender whispering. Soobin closed his eyes and turned his face to the sky. The wet gravel gave way to damp, dark sand, as he made his way to the fire pit, and it felt cold on his bare feet. He ducked down by the smoker over the pit and checked that it would hold. Seemed sturdy, even after all the rain, and a semi-recent use. He shrugged. As long as it worked. He went back into the house to retrieve his fish from where they were drying and began to go about starting a nice, smoky fire.</p>
<p>He whiled away the time wandering the beach and making sure the fire never got too hot. Waded out into the shallows once or twice, with his jeans rolled to his knees.</p>
<p>Around two in the afternoon, Kai emerged from the house, rubbing his eyes, hair wild. He sat down in the sand a few feet upwind of the fire—though very little smoke escaped the smoker—and watched Soobin build a sandcastle.</p>
<p>"You're good at that."</p>
<p>Soobin looked up, mildly startled. He'd been so engrossed in making little towers of sand he'd only noticed Kai in a peripheral sort of way. He glanced down at his castle and back to Kai with a crooked half-smile. "Am I?" He decided to build another tower.</p>
<p>"Well, yeah." Kai walked over on his knees and settled down beside Soobin, adjusting his glasses. "Whenever I tried to build sandcastles as a kid they always collapsed. Or looked like blobs." He leaned his head on Soobin's shoulder. "But yours is so neat and... it actually looks like a castle." He tittered to himself.</p>
<p>"You flatter me." Soobin nudged Kai, smiling, and said, "Help me make a moat."</p>
<p>Kai scoffed. "I'll just ruin it. I'm no good at anything."</p>
<p>Soobin shook his head and took Kai's wrist, pulling his hand to rest alongside the castle. "You're good at writing. And you won't ruin it." He raised his eyebrows. "I promise. Just dig a line."</p>
<p>Rolling his eyes, Kai started to scratch a little trench through the sand. As he dug the miniature moat, he muttered, "I'm not that good at writing. I'm just lucky."</p>
<p>"You're good at painting."</p>
<p>A noncommittal grunt.</p>
<p>"You are!" Soobin tapped the back of Kai's hand with the tip of his finger. "The illustrations in your books are very pretty. Really."</p>
<p>"Thanks. I guess."</p>
<p>Soobin sighed. "You just cannot take a compliment, can you?"</p>
<p>Kai ginned and stabbed at a pebble obstructing his moat. "It's called low self-esteem, Soobin." He tossed a piece of shell away. It bounced on the sand. "I really don't think I'm that great at anything. I mean, I guess the books I make end up okay but I feel like they're not good enough. But—oh well, you know? As long as I can get by, mediocre or not, I guess that's alright."</p>
<p>For a few seconds, Soobin didn't respond.</p>
<p>But then, softly, he said, "You're good at making me smile."</p>
<p>That made Kai go still, in the middle of widening a section of the moat. He let out a breath and an unsteady, quiet laugh. "Don't be silly. You <em>must</em> smile even when I'm not around." He kept his eyes on the sandcastle, but moved his hand to take Soobin's.</p>
<p>Soobin shook his head. "Not very often." He squeezed Kai's fingers. "There are a few things that make me smile... Strong wind and rain, books, a few songs, and you." He paused. "Especially you." He snorted and looked out at the sea. "Sometimes, at the end of the day, my face hurts from all the smiles you cause."</p>
<p>Kai didn't know what to say. So he acted on an impulse instead, and leaned up to kiss Soobin. As first kisses go, it was kind of salty. But nice. Soobin seemed too surprised to react at first, but after a moment's hesitation, he let his hands come up to frame Kai's face and kissed him back.</p>
<p>When Kai drew away, Soobin watched him with a somewhat dazed expression. Kai hoped it was a good daze.</p>
<p>"Um—" He cleared his throat. "Was that okay?"</p>
<p>Soobin nodded. He seemed at a loss for words. "I—" He scratched the back of his neck. "Yes. It's been a long time since..." A vague gesture. "Since I've done that." He couldn't help but grin a little bit, ducking his head and turning a little pink around the ears.</p>
<p>"Me too."</p>
<p>"Oh. That's... reassuring. I suppose." Soobin sighed. "Sorryy I’m… I usually don't have this much trouble expressing myself properly."</p>
<p>Kai snorted and leaned against Soobin's side. "Take your own advice and don't say you're sorry unless you've done something wrong." He tilted his head at an awkward angle to beam up at Soobin. "It's okay to have trouble with your words, sometimes. God knows I can never figure out what the hell to say."</p>
<p>"You just did pretty well, to be honest."</p>
<p>"Better at giving pep talks than I thought, huh?" Kai smirked.</p>
<p>Soobin nodded wordlessly.</p>
<p>"Um..." Kai wiggled his toes in the sand, moat forgotten. "What're you making? On the fire, I mean."</p>
<p>"I'm smoking salmon."</p>
<p>"Ahh."</p>
<p>Kai leaned back on his palms, warm wet sand between his fingers, and looked up at the sky. "I saw a flier for a drive-in theater, the other day. It looks neat. Um, I think we'd have to bring a radio to get the sound, but we could just take my motorcycle or your bike or walk or something...?"</p>
<p>"Yeah?" Soobin looked up, too. White clouds scooted around the sky here and there, shifting with the breeze. "When is it?"</p>
<p>"Uh... Friday?" Kai made a face. "I think? I'll call you about it, or something."</p>
<p>"Alright."</p>
<p>Overhead, a seagull cried.</p>
<p>"So..." Kai coughed.</p>
<p>Soobin smiled at him. "So?"</p>
<p>"So, uh..." Kai began to realize that although it had been something like three weeks since he met Soobin, they still knew very little about each other. "Truth or Dare?"</p>
<p>"Excuse me?"</p>
<p>Kai made the most scandalized face he could. "You don't know Truth or Dare?!" He sat up straighter and crossed his arms. "Unacceptable!"</p>
<p>Soobin tried not to look too perturbed, but failed pretty miserably. "Should I know it?" He put a hand out to Kai, who seemed torn between laughter and faux-sternness. "It sounds like a game. We didn't play many games when I was young. Is it some sort of question game?"</p>
<p>"What? Why didn't you—Never mind. I can pry into your personal life later." Kai hopped up onto his knees and planted his hands on his hips, looming non-threateningly over Soobin. "Basically, you're right. It's a game where we take turns asking 'truth or dare?' So, I ask you that, and you pick one. And if you pick 'truth,' I get to ask you a question and you have to answer with the truth. And if you pick dare—"</p>
<p>"Let me guess," Soobin's eyebrows seemed to be attempting to escape from his face. "You give me a task, and I have to do it?"</p>
<p>"Yes!"</p>
<p>Soobin huffed out a quiet laugh. "You're so enthusiastic about it," he said. "I suppose we could try it. I think you'd better start, though."</p>
<p>Kai tittered and settled back down on the sand, facing Soobin rather than sitting beside him. He sat back on his heels. "Okay, so? Truth or dare?"</p>
<p>"...Dare."</p>
<p>"Well, now that I know you don't like to talk about yourself, I dare you to..." Kai paused. He hummed to himself, at a loss. "Shit. Um. Go walk into the water in all your clothes."</p>
<p>Pushing himself to his feet, Soobin asked, "That's it?"</p>
<p>"Shut up! I'm uncreative."</p>
<p>He got a snort in response, as Soobin walked down the beach. He waded out into the surf until the water came up to his armpits, and spread his arms out. Kai shouted, "Duck your head!" So Soobin briefly disappeared from sight, and reappeared soaking wet. He returned, pushing his dripping hair back from his forehead. He plopped down next to Kai, "accidentally" getting a bit of sand on the shorter man's already-sandy pajama pants.</p>
<p>He leveled a stare on Kai. "My turn, right? Truth, or dare?"</p>
<p>"Truth. Because dares require effort. I'd rather lay on top of you and answer dumb questions." Kai demonstrated his point further by draping himself across Soobin's lap, leaning his head against Soobin's chest. "Now ask me."</p>
<p>"Alright." One of Soobin's hands settled on Kai's knee as he thought. "What is... the absolute worst gift you've ever received?"</p>
<p>Kai thought for a few seconds. "My great aunt gave me a box of extra-large condoms when I was in twelfth grade. I think she forgot it was my birthday and just grabbed something at the last minute. Needless to say, I threw them away."</p>
<p>Soobin grinned. "That is pretty terrible." He paused. "Am I to understand that you're too small for them?"</p>
<p>"Oh my God." Kai covered his face with his hands. "That wasn't the purpose of that story."</p>
<p>"I can tell."</p>
<p>Kai buried his face in Soobin's neck.</p>
<p>"You're blushing." Soobin stroked Kai's knee with his thumb and smiled slightly. "It's your turn to ask again."</p>
<p>"I know, I know." Kai wasn't sure if he was responding to Soobin's first sentence, or the second one. He puffed out a breath, and tried not to blush further. "So, pick."</p>
<p>"You have to <em>ask</em> me."</p>
<p>Kai rolled his eyes with a snort. "<em>Fine</em>. Truth or dare?"</p>
<p>"Dare."</p>
<p>"Why am I not surprised?"</p>
<p>Soobin gave Kai's knee a light pat—a pretend slap. "You shush. Dare me to do something."</p>
<p>A long silence.</p>
<p>Eventually, "I dare you to make out with me."</p>
<p>Voice low, Soobin said, "Somehow, I doubt that's much of a dare." He interrupted Kai's inevitable protest and pressed their mouths together. It was an awkward angle, so he grabbed Kai and practically dragged him up to encourage him to move. Kai got with the picture and sat so his knees dug into the sand on either side of Soobin's hips.</p>
<p>Soobin's mouth was, not shockingly, very warm. Like his hands.</p>
<p>Kai would hesitate to say they "made out," because usually in his mind that entailed a lot more tongue and teeth and a lot less actually being able to breathe... But there it was. Really modest making out. Chaste, even.</p>
<p>The younger drew back and asked, "You uh... you've never actually made out with anyone, have you?" He tried not to seem teasing, but he feared he came off that way anyway.</p>
<p>Soobin frowned. "Is it obvious?"</p>
<p>"No! I mean, a little? Not in an inexperienced way—" Kai sighed. "I always think of french kisses when I think of, you know, <em>making out</em>." He shrugged.</p>
<p>"Oh... Do you... want me to...?" Soobin made a face. He obviously had no desire to be French in any way, shape or form.</p>
<p>"No! No—not unless you want to."</p>
<p>Still frowning, Soobin nodded. "I'd prefer not to, to be honest. I... I didn't enjoy it, the one time I tried..."</p>
<p>He wouldn't meet Kai's eyes. Seemed nervous, suddenly, when he hadn't been before. Kai cupped Soobin's face in his hands, bumping their foreheads together, and said, "If you don't like it, we won't do it." He met Soobin's eyes. "Okay?"</p>
<p>"I—okay." Soobin smiled. "Thank you."</p>
<p>"I'm just being a decent person."</p>
<p>"And I'm glad." Soobin let his arms wrap loosely around Kai's waist, and spoke softly. "I've met some less than decent people in my life, so I'm glad you're a good one."</p>
<p>Kai kissed the corner of his mouth.</p>
<p>They spent the afternoon lazily. Soobin checked that the fire remained a steady temperature, and Kai drew pictures in the sand, still in his pajamas, occasionally shoving at his glasses when they slipped down his nose. He should have just left them at home, but sometimes the ability to see won out over style and convenience. He grumbled and took them off, setting them carefully down on a flat, worn piece of driftwood wedged deep into the sand.</p>
<p>Soobin tilted his head curiously. "You don't like those, do you?"</p>
<p>"Hm?" Kai frowned. Followed Soobin's gesture. "Oh. I dunno." He scratched a little swirl into the sand by his feet. "I feel kind of silly in glasses. And they get in the way. But mostly I just feel like I look dumb in them, I guess." He laughed. "I sound like a teenager. 'I hate glasses! So uncool!'"</p>
<p>"I don't think you look dumb in them." Soobin lay back against the sand. "They make you look..."</p>
<p>"Smart?"</p>
<p>"Cute."</p>
<p>Kai blushed and kicked at Soobin's side with his bare foot. "I'm not cute, I'm handsome."</p>
<p>Soobin raised his eyebrows. "Can't the two go hand-in-hand?"</p>
<p>"Maybe."</p>
<p>"Definitely." Soobin stared up at the sky for a moment. It darkened at the edges, and the sun hung closer to the horizon, sending bright light flickering over the waves. He pushed himself up with a grunt and said, "I'll be right back." He disappeared into the house for a few moments. Came back out with a glass casserole dish full of what Kai had to assume were potatoes—they were wrapped in foil. He walked past Kai and stopped by the fire.</p>
<p>"Are you going to smoke the potatoes too?"</p>
<p>Soobin laughed. "No, Hueningie, I am not going to <em>smoke</em> the potatoes." He picked up the tee-pee shaped smoker and set it off to the side, exposing the fire more fully and sending a puff of smoke into the air. He moved the fish—set them in the casserole dish next to the potatoes—and poked at the fire a little bit. He put the foil-wrapped potatoes around the edge of the fire, on the hot ashes. He stoked the fire, and sat down beside Kai again.</p>
<p>"Won't the fish get cold?"</p>
<p>"Oh." Soobin stood up again and grabbed the casserole dish. "I'm actually going to freeze most of this. The rest, however, is going into some pasta." He went back into the house.</p>
<p>Kai shook his head.</p>
<p>When the potatoes finished, they sat in the sand and ate them with a bit of crumbled up fish shoved inside, and some sour cream. Kai burned his tongue, but other than that he enjoyed himself. The sky had cleared completely, and a breeze whispered through the lavender in front of Soobin's house. Though it did send a little bit of sand into Kai's face, which he found less than pleasant.</p>
<p>"Gross."</p>
<p>Soobin laughed.</p>
<p>They stayed out there for Kai didn't know how long. Late—late enough for the sun to finally cling to the horizon and highlight the edges of the cloudless sky orange and yellow. Kai squinted into the light. He dug his fingers into the now-dry sand. It was warm to the touch. He leaned on Soobin and reached for his glasses, shoving them onto his face. The sunset came more into focus.</p>
<p>"What time is it?" He wiggled his toes—though it was getting dark, the air remained relatively warm, and the breeze had died away completely at least an hour earlier.</p>
<p>Soobin glanced at the watch on his wrist. "About nine."</p>
<p>"Wow—really?"</p>
<p>"Yes."</p>
<p>"Huh."</p>
<p>Pushing himself to his feet, Soobin asked, "I want to show you the stars."</p>
<p>Kai tilted his head. "Um... they're just... in the sky. I can see them." He pointed. "Up there."</p>
<p>"No, no." Soobin reached down and pulled Kai up to stand beside him. "I want to show you <em>all</em> of the stars. Away from the light pollution. Have you ever seen the Milky Way in real life?" He took Kai's hand. "It's amazing. When I first moved here from New York—I had never even seen the ocean, and I knew stars existed but I never knew just how many there were. When you go out to the middle of nowhere, on a trail or in a boat, and you can look up at the stars without the pollution from a city, it's like being immersed in the sky." His eyes were wide, and he smiled. Like a little boy excited to show someone his favorite hiding place. "You have to see it."</p>
<p>"Okay, okay!" Kai let Soobin drag him toward the side of the house. "But what are we going to do? I'm in my pajamas."</p>
<p>"As long as you have a lifejacket, it doesn't matter. I won't be fishing, so we don't need to worry as much about proper gear. And we'll be going slow."</p>
<p>Kai nodded. "So, you're taking me out in your sailboat, for a night cruise?" He snorted. "Sounds like something straight out of a rom-com."</p>
<p>"Except I'm actually taking you out in my rowboat."</p>
<p>"You have a <em>rowboat</em>?"</p>
<p>Soobin shrugged. He pulled at a tarp, revealing a sturdy looking rowboat large enough to seat two people. He rummaged around underneath one of the benches and pulled out a few things. First, lifejackets. He helped Kai put one on, and pulled his own on as well. He handed Kai a fairly large camping lantern—the kind with a hook attached for hanging from boughs and the insides of tents and that kind of thing.</p>
<p>"I want you to go upstairs, into the laundry room, and get out on the roof, and put this on the roof. There's a special spot for it you can't miss. Put it there, make sure it's secure, and turn it on its highest setting." He pushed Kai away gently. "It's got a brand new battery, so don't worry about power."</p>
<p>Kai scurried away to do as he was told. He found that he really couldn't miss the spot for the lamp. There was a little metal mount with hinges that fit the lantern perfectly and actually bolted down to hold it in place. Kai turned the light on, nearly blinding himself in the process, and clambered back through the window.</p>
<p>When he came back outside, Soobin had pulled the boat out to the front of the house. "Help me carry this." He gestured to the rowboat.</p>
<p>They hauled it northward together, and as they walked, Soobin said, "We're not going out into the open waters. The bay leads to a stream—or maybe it's a river; I never bothered to check—that's much safer and still goes far away enough from civilization that visibility is high. But first, we have to get to it."</p>
<p>"Darn you for being responsible." Kai huffed and puffed</p>
<p>Soobin laughed breathlessly.</p>
<p>Just when Kai felt like he wouldn't be able to help any longer, Soobin instructed him to let his end of the boat down. He did so with a great deal of relief and shook out his arms. "Gonna be sore tomorrow..."</p>
<p>"Three minutes carrying half a rowboat won't kill you. Don’t think I can’t see your muscles." Soobin fiddled around with a few things in the growing darkness. He set up his running lights—white on the stern and red and green sidelights on the bow. He pushed it into a narrower area of the bay Kai hadn't noticed before.</p>
<p>"You can get in first. I'll steady you." He held his hand out.</p>
<p>Kai let Soobin help him into the boat, and sat down gingerly. He'd never actually been on anything smaller than a pontoon boat, so it felt a little strange. And kind of a little bit terrifying. But he trusted that he'd be safe... ish. This was Soobin, after all, and they both wore lifejackets. He couldn't help but grip at the side, however, when Soobin sat down facing Kai (and the stern), and the boat rocked slightly. Soobin gave him a reassuring smile.</p>
<p>"Have you ever been out in a boat?" Soobin glanced over his shoulder and began to row.</p>
<p>Kai's hands clenched into fists on his knees. "Um..." He looked down at his bare feet, toes curled. "I've been on my uncle's catamaran, but that's it."</p>
<p>"Well, you can relax."</p>
<p>Kai tried but it didn't really work. He still felt unsteady—what if they capsized?</p>
<p>As if Soobin could read Kai's mind, he said, "We won't capsize. I promise." He nudged Kai's ankle with his foot. "And you've got your flotation device. We're not in open water. Like I said: safe."</p>
<p>"I guess."</p>
<p>"Look at me."</p>
<p>Kai met Soobin's eyes rather reluctantly. He couldn't really see his face in the darkness, even with his glasses, but that didn't matter much. Soobin smiled at him, and Kai could just see the white flash of his teeth. He felt himself relaxing almost immediately. Something about Soobin's smile made Kai feel so much more at ease—probably endorphins or something. He grinned back, and maybe accidentally let his legs stretch out a bit, so their toes just barely brushed. Not in a footsie way... more like an "I'm comfortable enough with you to let our feet touch" way. It was more comfortable, anyway.</p>
<p>"Okay, good." Soobin didn't pull away, or anything, so that was a good sign. "Now I want you to keep an eye out, and if you see any lights or anything, tell me."</p>
<p>"Oh—sure." Kai cleared his throat and tried to look observant. He saw nothing, though. Only the glitter of the moonlight on the water.</p>
<p>The bay widened up again. It seemed to kind of balloon outward, and then narrowed once more and broke off into a few separate rivers and streams. Soobin took a moment to figure out where he wanted to go, and headed for one of the larger outlets. Didn't want to get stuck after all. He steered them carefully with the oars. Took a moment to point. "Look."</p>
<p>Kai followed the direction of his pointing finger. Just off in the distance he could see a tiny speck of light.</p>
<p>"That's the lantern I had you put out. In a moment you won't be able to see it."</p>
<p>As he spoke, the light disappeared.</p>
<p>"We're more than 500 meters away from my house."</p>
<p>"So, what, a five minute walk?"</p>
<p>"Yes." Soobin checked over his shoulder and adjusted the direction of the boat a little bit.</p>
<p>"Wait, what the hell kind of lantern is visible from 500 meters away?!"</p>
<p>Soobin smirked. "The very expensive kind." He paused. "But it only lasts for five hours on the highest setting, so we can't stay out too long or we might get lost."</p>
<p>Kai frowned and scratched his ankle with his toes. "But... wouldn't we get lost anyway, out here? Since we can't see it—I mean, once the light's visible it's like five minutes to your house on foot so why would you need it?"</p>
<p>"Well," Soobin stopped rowing and fumbled for something under his bench. He pulled out a little dark square-shaped thing. "I have a GPS. And a compass, somewhere. So if I <em>really</em> get lost, I can use those to get back." He shoved the GPS back under his seat. "But I don't really use them much. The lantern on the roof is mostly so I don't have to think once I'm carrying the boat back, and it also lets my closest neighbor know I'm out on the bay." He smiled again. "He stays up all night so if I never come home, and he saw the lamp on at night, he'll know to tell someone where I went."</p>
<p>"...I guess that sort of makes sense? In a weird way."</p>
<p>Soobin Chuckled.</p>
<p>After about an hour, Soobin stopped. He pulled the oars into the boat. The horizon had long since gone completely dark and the half-moon hung in the sky.</p>
<p>"See?"</p>
<p>Kai adjusted his glasses and tilted his head back to look up.</p>
<p>He wasn't sure, but he might have stopped breathing for a moment.</p>
<p>Above, stars covered the sky. In every direction they scattered like loose glitter or dust, denser in some areas than others, swirling around each other. The Milky Way stretched overhead, thick with pricks of light, like a cloud made from stardust. He'd never seen anything so stunning—sure, he'd seen pictures of the sky, and in theory knew it looked something like this, but seeing it in person... That was an entirely different experience.</p>
<p>He stared at it for a long time. Eventually, he spoke, barely audible. "Soobin, this is amazing."</p>
<p>"I told you."</p>
<p>"Yeah, but—" Kai let out a huff. "<em>Wow</em>."</p>
<p>"Couldn't have said it better myself."</p>
<p>"Shush!" Kai aimed a half-hearted kick at Soobin's ankle, grinning. "Meanie."</p>
<p>Soobin laughed to himself. "I have just been called a 'meanie' by a full adult." He shook his head and looked up at the stars. "Writing juvenile fiction must turn you into a child yourself, hm?"</p>
<p>"Would you like it better if I told you to fuck off?"</p>
<p>All Kai got in response was a wider grin. He huffed.</p>
<p>That night, when Kai got home, he stripped down to his underwear for bed. When his still-sandy pajama pants dropped to the floor, though, something clacked. He frowned and knelt down to rummage through the pocket. A seashell. The one Soobin had given him. He turned it over in his hand. Held it up to his ear and listened to the rushing sound it made. He smiled and set the shell on his nightstand.</p>
<p>He slept with the window open and the shell within reach.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>sorry it took too long i was busy with school :(</p>
        </blockquote><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>this tag needs more love smh</p></blockquote></div></div>
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